A
male
age
36-40,
*akeee
writes:I just got a few quick questions here and I would love it if you guy's help me out with this one, ok so it's a new school year new people new class, in one of my classes there is this girl I am interested in getting to know her and what not, I actually started talking to her in class but we did not reach to the certain level where I could ask her anything I want, basically I talk to her during class if i get the chance to and after class I walk her out, but how would i take it to the next level? I ran out of ideas to talk to her about cause idk what she is into and another thing i would like to take into considerationg is whether or not she has a bf cause she is pretty gorgeous and she texts a lot in class then talks on the phone after class so is this a sign that means she has a bf? or should I just focus on my game and try to find out later.I am just scared of going down the same road I went with my ex and this girl stands out for me in all the girls in my class so I would love it if you guys give me some tips and ideas. I SEE HER TOMORROW so reply asap please :-D Thanks for the help!
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female
reader, HereAreMyTwoCents +, writes (14 October 2009):
 I think the best approach (to most things is life), is the direct approach. No beating around the bush. Just ask her if she has a boyfriend, because you think she is attractive. (Trust me, she won't mind the compliment). If she says no boyfriend, ask her if she wants to go out sometime. I know it's hard to be that direct for a lot of people, but it really saves a lot of hassle, and it is NOT rude or inappropriate. And it makes you and the other person feel that you are a genuine, decent, honest and confident human being, and someone that she might seriously regret saying NO to.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009): Well there is no full proof plan when it comes to getting the person you are interested in to be interested in you too. She might have a boyfriend or she might be the type of person who has a lot of friends that she IMs during class.This is what you do: Instead of asking point blank if she has a boyfriend, ask her if she would like to have lunch or get something to drink sometime (or maybe after the class you have together). This will let her know that you want more than just casual conversation during class, that you want a relationship with her. Believe me, she will get the hint especially if she is pretty, you won't be the first to have asked her.Perhaps she will say no because she has a boyfriend or because she is busy. Or, she might be so flattered that you asked and say yes. Either way, respect what she says and actually listen. I am in a situation of my own right now. I am a little older than you but I have a guy in my class who always sits next to me and makes conversation. One day, he asked me out and I said I had a boyfriend but we could know each other as classmates/study buddies. He said that he was disappointed but said he might take me up on my offer to study sometime. I thought I made it very clear that we could only be classmates or study partners nothing more since I have a boyfriend. But, today, point blank he asks if I am free for lunch tomorrow and then insists to walk me to my next class, and it felt like harassment a little. I don't want to be a "bitch" but I can see that if this escalates I will have to remind him of my boyfriend and be more direct if not rude. So, don't make her feel guilty. If she says no, then no, don't keep pressing her on it. But if she does say no, just know that she is not the right girl. You want to be with a girl that is just crazy for you and who you are also enamored with. Why would you want to be with someone who isn't really into you? You deserve more!!! If she rejects you, her rejection doesn't mean that anything is wrong with you, she just doesn't feel the way she needs to feel for you in order to date you or she is preoccupied with someone else.Good luck! No matter what she will respect your courage and maturity!
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A
male
reader, Delboy69  +, writes (14 October 2009):
ok buddie - I'll give it to you straight
Women like men (teenagers whatever) who are CONFIDENT. If you are shy and retiring you will NOT get with this girl.
What you want to tell her (to her face and totally upfront) is that your heading to this movie this weekend and you want her to go with you coz you really like her. If she says no, its her loss and you move on.
In my experience, be confident, ask, she will go and spend money you don't have to keep her happy. Shallow - but effective !
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