A
female
age
36-40,
*outhernAdvice
writes: Ok, here is my story. I have these 2 friends they are girls and I am a girl as well. I met my first friend at work about 2 years ago (Friend A) and Friend B came in a year later. By this time Friend A and I got close, hung out, had fun and became like sisters! We started hanging out with friend B and it was fun and we still hang out and is still fun. Friend A and I live closer to each other and Friend B lives about 30 minutes away. Friend A and I visit Friend B as often as we can, so all of us can hang out together. But because Friend A and I so much alike and live closer to each other we hang out a little more. Friend B texts us saying she is mad at us when Friend and I hang out, even if we just go out to eat. Lately, I've been feeling a not so genuine feeling about Friend B and the jealousy is just making it worse. Am I wrong for feeling this? I kind of don't want to make a friendship effort toward her anymore. I hate jealousy, drama and people that don't see the good side of things. What should I do? End the friendship? Talk to it? I just don't know where to go with this feel. Thank you so much in advance.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 January 2013):
I understand how friend B feels but you are not responsible for her feelings.
If you don't want to make the effort any more you just don't. Don't call. Don't text. Just go on with life.
she will contact you. IF she is nice and friendly and not whining or doing the "poor poor pitiful me" thing, respond.
IGNORE all whining and negative comments and behavior.
You may want to tell her that you like her and it's NOT a contest but you and A live closer and it's just easier.
I get that. I have some friends I see way more than others because they are closer...
IF Friend B can't cope, well she's not ready to be a mature friend.
A
female
reader, Dear Mandy +, writes (15 January 2013):
HI
I understand how frustrating this must be for you. Maybe she never really had any real friends untill you both came along, and now she feels threatend. I would first talk with her about it and explain what you have just written here. Maybe try to include her a little more when you and your other friend are going out, ask her if she wants to meet up. she may live 30 min away but just asking her will make her feel part of it still. If she still acts the same way then I would cut your losses and move on. What does friend A think about all this?
Mandy x
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A
female
reader, mrswaldhauser +, writes (15 January 2013):
Are you sure you are 22-25 because this sounds very playground highschool to me? You need to tell friend b to grow up and stop being pathetic and that you can be friends with whoever you want to be. If she is jealous of you two she needs to just get over it but the fact that she is and upsetting you over it and causing trouble shows shes very immature and perhaps not a great friend choice for you! Not until she grows up at least!
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