A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm having a hard time finding a job which is really affecting me emotionally and financially.My parents are splitting up my dad moved out yesterday on my mums birthday:(. and my mum won't talk about it. He's moving in with another woman. But my mum is the sweetest and kindest person I know and she loves my dad so much:( and my boyfriend is never there for me. I'm going through so much at the moment but he has no idea because he has refused to speak to me cause I complained to his friend about our relationship. He ignores me everything he's angry. How can we fix it and talk things out when he won't even speak to me and tell me what I've done wrong?I can't stop crying. I need him so much right now but he won't speak to me:( am I being too sensitive? I just feel like he doesn't care and I've told him to tell me if is over but he does t say anything:(
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDear Youwish.
No, I'm not crushing on his friend. We were both talking to eachother about our relationship he was complaining about his gf saying he wanted to leave her but I kept telling him to work things out. & when I told him my bf was difficult & that he ignores me whenever there's a problem & that no girl likes being ignored she'd run to the next guy who would show interest.
The guy then went & showed that part of the convo to my bf & also said I was the one who started messaging him & that I like him. (He messaged me first) My bf asked to see all our conversation & I sent it to him but he hasn't spoken to me since.
The night that guy texted me I rang my bf & messaged him several times to call me cause I wanted to tell him his friend was messaging me but he never got back to me.
I love him I'd never cheat on him. I only complained cause I thought they were close friends & that I could speak to him I didn't know he was trying to set me up:(
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (23 June 2014):
 I'm confused as to why you complained to his friend about your relationship with him. That's oftentimes a grooming maneuver for those looking to cheat on their partners with their friends. Why not talk to your boyfriend, or complain to one of YOUR friends about him?? Complaining to one of HIS friends is irregular.
If your boyfriend hasn't been speaking to you for that long that he doesn't know your parents are splitting, then it's been awhile. I'm saying there's more to it than just the fact that you complained, because if that's all it was, a boyfriend who was interested in keeping the relationship may be pissed off that you slammed him to a friend of his, but would get over it and want to talk out the problems.
This guy is done. If the relationship was already something you had to complain about to his friends, it means it was probably in the coffin anyways. Time to let him go and be there for your mom and concentrate on getting a job and get your life back on track. You don't need him or anyone, and getting hung up on thinking that you DO need him is self-destructive. You need to be independent and self-reliant.
That's a cardinal rule, BTW. You don't slam your partner to his friends. That's a crappy thing to do, especially if it's a serious relationship. I'm also wondering if there were feelings for his friend involved, and your boyfriend is thinking you were cheating with the guy. How much truth is there in that? Are you crushing on his friend or vice versa?
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A
female
reader, Caring Aunty A  +, writes (23 June 2014):
 Of all the Birthday gifts one could give, your Dad topped it by spending it on a Divorce by moving in with another woman! Flowers would have been cheaper? I’m sad that you and your Mum have this pain :( I know you would like to share this with someone who’ll give you support and a shoulder to cry on i.e. from a boyfriend.
Yet it’s unfortunate that your boyfriend is hung up about something you said, that you can’t explain yourself to him… He’s definitely showing signs of not caring even if he doesn’t know about the present situation. He appears stubborn for some reason.
But right now you have to cry a little and choose where to refocus; a job and your Mum would be my suggestion. Plus try again to talk to your Mum after the shock has subsided a little. She maybe feeling fragile considering this was done to her on her Birthday of all days!?
Take Care – CAA
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2014): "How can we fix it and talk things out when he won't even speak to me and tell me what I've done wrong?"
You can't.
":( am I being too sensitive?"
No.
"I just feel like he doesn't care . . ."
He doesn't.
". . . and I've told him to tell me if is over but he does t say anything:("
What's stopping YOU from telling HIM it's over? If you two are shacking up and therefore you're currently financially dependent on him then perhaps you could move in with your mother and provide mutual support for each other.
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