A
female
age
41-50,
*othermother
writes:It's a bit like daja vu! I was on here just over a year ago with exactly the question!! My boyfriend and I split up because his mother didnt like our relationship, but we worked through that issue and became close again but it was in 'secret'.I`m 31 and I have four children so in his mothers eyes i`m not the perfect choice for her blue eyed boy. We had a fantastic relationship and never argued and he adored my children and equaly he adored them. the split: well he came round my place mid week, everything was fine and we were pleased to see each other. then he recieved a phone call form the dreaded mother 'I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE, GET HOME NOW' his mother demanded (she followed him thats how he got caught)he`s 27 BTW. so he did unfortunatly. the next day he called and said its over and I dont love you. he told me that his mum just cried and said he was a letdown. he is an amazing gentle person who doesnt do anger.i would like to add exactly the same was said the time we spilt before. I`m finding this really hard because I know he loves me and he also promised he would defend our relationship if the same occured.well its been two long weeks since that day and he phones me everyday, he wants me to be his friend and he has since admitted he still loves me. He does keep telling me we cant get back together, but he also gives me signs that he needs time.just wondered if any of you guys can understnad this situation? and if you have any advice regarding overbearing mothers so I can help him to 'grow up'.
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (1 June 2010):
I'm sorry, but if a man can't stand up to his mother when he's 27, he never will. You need to move on now, or you'll end up wasting your life with this man. Take it from a man that you can't change him or make him grow up. Please stop wasting time with him, and move on. All the love in the world and all the help in the world from you will not make him grow up. End it, move on.
A
female
reader, sunnycomet  +, writes (1 June 2010):
 I'm sorry, this must be so frustrating for you.
My advice is to move on. He's not ready to be in a relationship and he has not independent from his mother yet. It's not fair to you that he treats you like this. He should stand up to his mother but he won't. Your only options are too act like kids and sneak around or find someone who is independent from his mother.
Good Luck!
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