A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i can't beleive this weekend and how badly i messed up. i'm 16, male, and wondered in the past if i might be bi or gay although i've dated girls. my parents were out of town so i asked a friend if he wanted to stay over and party with me. he's my age and we've known each other for four years. between smoking what we had and my parents liquor cabinet, we were pretty buzzed. i put on some porn and we were having fun, first with some straight porn and later with gay videos. i could hardly beleive it when he dared me to perform oral sex on him like in the video. i guess i was loaded enough to try and he was loaded enough to let me. later, i had sex with him before he passed out. i don't remember much except stopping when he threw up. he left the next morning without saying anything and i spent the day cleaning up our mess. he txt msg me and wants to talk. i still consider him my friend and wonder how badly i messed things up. I have new feelings for him but am embarrassed at how things turned out. i wish i could have a do over. any advice on what i should say. i guess sorry would be a good start. any other suggestions?
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2010): You and your friend sound pretty mature about it. Him texting you saying he wanted to talk is a plus. Maybe the two of you have something going. Make sure you guys are safe, and your business is your own so keep it that way for the sake of your friendship.
A
male
reader, der_zyniker +, writes (24 August 2010):
Just go to talk to him and see what he has to say and take it from there. It's going to be okay.
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A
male
reader, lenhud  +, writes (23 August 2010):
ask him ih he liked what you 2 did . he will soon tell you if he wants to do it again
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A
male
reader, AvgGuy1 +, writes (23 August 2010):
 If your friend texted you and wants to talk... then... go talk to him. I'll bet he probably feels as weird about it as you do.
You first time with another guys is ALWAYS weird/terrifying. I wouldn't go blurting out how your feeling have increased/changed until you find out from him how he feels about the whole situation.
Most likely... it's gonna turn out to be one of those 'I won't say anything to anyone else... if you don't' kinds of things... or... you could find that you now have a boyfriend.
Go talk to him.
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (23 August 2010):
Hi there. You need to have a private talk with him with no-one else around, and talk about what happened.
It doesn't mean that you are gay. It was probably just experimentation.
You need to ask youself how you feel about girls, and how you feel about boys. Are you attracted to girls? Are you attracted to boys? Be honest with yourself and then work out where you stand. Only time will tell.
Best wishes.
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