A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I made a terrible mistake... I got together with my classmate, who was my best friend, and I really really liked him. But my relationship with my ex didn't end "completely" because he said he would come back to me later, and I thought about him still a lot. But in the meantime I kind of fell in love with my best friend...so I got together with him. But then my ex showed up and I started dreaming about him, and so on, and I thought it wouldn't be fair to my bf.. I knew I would regret it, but I left my bf for my ex. But it was a terrible mistake. After some weeks, I realized, that I didn't even love my ex anymore, I just thought I did. Unfortunately I didn't keep in touch with my classmate (this happened during the summer), who loved me so much, but then he realised that he needs to forget me. And he did. He said he had fallen out of love with me. I cried for him, begged him to come back, or just fix our friendship, but he can't. He is not interested in me anymore. And I totally understand this...but we were so close, and he loved me more than anyone ever did, and now he doesn't even look at me. It's killing me.. I can't forget him, I see him every day... And I tried to do my best but I can't fix this. I hate myself because I lost my best friend and my soul mate and it was all because of me. I cry every day... he told me he couldn't be my friend anymore because he couldn't act like he used to :( What should I do?? I can't forget him and it hurts so bad, I even cut myself.. please help:(
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male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (4 December 2010):
 Stop your weeping and take a deep breath.
Be patient and give him more time. After a few weeks when all the wounds have had time to heal, you may seek friendship once more with him and gradually rebuild what was once there.
If you truly believe that you are soul mates, then have faith, you two will be together if you were meant to be. Time will reveal all answers. Who knows, perhaps in the future you may not even feel this way about him and yes I realize that right now that seems impossible but do not be so quick to discount it.
Do not cut yourself anymore. You will find that the droplets of blood do little to truly ease your pain. The marks on your flesh do nothing to soften the memories. Find a way to smile again, find hope, find peace. Be with friends and family, do things that you love doing so that you may smile. When he sees you happy, he will feel welcome to be your friend again. You see, joy serves more than bitter lamenting ever will.
I hope that helps.
A
female
reader, TheHuggleBear  +, writes (4 December 2010):
 Ok, sounds like you did make a bit of a mistake there my love; but you're 16/17. It's a bit early to be talking about soulmates isnt it? I know it feels like the biggest thing in the world right now; but you need to stop thinking about it, stop over analysing, and move on. Yes, keep in touch with your friend; yes, try and fix your friendship; but you need to say "enough now."
Cutting yourself is a very serious thing; and it's something that you need to talk to someone about -- it can't carry on.
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