A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am in love with this guy and I do not have the courage to tell him how I feel. i dont know how he feels. we have this connection with each other. ever since we met, he tells me things about his personal life that even my best friends wouldnt tell me. I never had this kind of connection with anyone. in fact i've never had close friendship with a guy before. so i dont know if all guys are like this, or is it because he feels something for me.Things are bit complicated. He is changing jobs which means he will have to move away for a couple of years and I am still studying. I have 6 months left of my course. We are both in same profession so he completely understands the pressure of the course i'm undertaking.If he gets a job away from home, we will move within a couple of months. But i have my exams in between now and then. So we cannot really see each other until after. But that then means that we will only have about a month or two together if we do start a relationship. I feel really down when he tells me that he is succeeding in finding a job, I dont want to get in the way of his happiness. there is no chance of me going with him, upon completing this course, due to other reasons.I feel that i do need to tell him something before he goes, if he goes, but that wont be until over a month.I cant stop thinking about him. I think he has realised something, because recently he was replying to my calls or texts, so i sent him a text saying to tell me if i had done something wrong. I later found out the reason why he did not reply is because he has been busy with interviews. When i was speaking to me, he realised something was up, as i was not in my usual mood (ie happy and chatty). I didnt tell him, its because of him i felt low, i told him i was feeling tired and ill.I know this is really long, but it would be great to have some advice.If you could suggest anything, that would be great.
View related questions:
best friend, my ex, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, moomoomoo  +, writes (20 January 2007):
 try flirting and see what happens. start out subtle and if he cooperates then just have fun with it and then evaluate the outcome.... i would highly advise against using the word love, but instead say "like a lot" or something along those lines to get that point across if you haven't been involved with this person.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2007): I agree with Salsere, you have to weigh up the pros and cons. If you tell him there is definitely a risk of ruining the friendship and that's a risk you have to be willing to take if you tell him. But also I agree that if he is a true friend then he wouldn't lose your friendship anyway. And if he did then he wouldn't be worth your friendship - although this is very easy for an outsider to say.
Perhaps instead of declaring your undying love for him you could just test the waters a bit, say something like, that someone you know waid you'd make a good couple, and see his reaction.
Anyway good luck. xx
...............................
A
female
reader, salsere  +, writes (20 January 2007):
I can see that this one is really hard for you, when you have such strong feelings for someone its always a huge risk of - do i or dont i say something, will i or wont i spoil the great friendship we have!!
you have to weigh up the pros and cons for yourself, only you know deep down whether its the right thing to come clean and tell him your feelings - no one else can answer that for you.
Many will suggest so many different things some people may of done so and it was the best choice they ever made because it worked out how they wanted, others will say no because it spoiled a beautiful friendship.
Me personally - i would say tell him out right, if he is that much of a good friend and he doesnt feel the same way for you, then he will let you down gently and to begin with it may be akward but if there is a true friendship there, i am sure you both will work it out and still have a great connection.
You never know he may feel the same way, and he COULD be thinking the way you are. I honestly think but its just my opinion and nothing more - you have nothing to lose if your friendship is as strong as you say it is!!
As for him moving away - dont worry about that now it hasnt happened, worry about it when he does get a job. if you two are meant to be it will work!!
GOOD LUCK HUN XXXXXX
...............................
|
