A
female
age
30-35,
*ilish
writes:Hey guys.I'm 16, almost 17, and currently in a 6 month relationship with my boyfriend who I absolutley love to pieces. He is the best, he does everything for me and is always there for me. I can be my total self around him all the time. We do have arguements and what not, but hey, who doesnt?However, I do have a lot of friends too. And they are always meeting up with groups of lads and going out and having fun. My boyfriend doesn't like me going out. I feel like I'm missing out on my teen years and not getting as involved as I should do with my friends.I know I'm never going to get these teen years back, but I also know I wouldn't find someone else like him. Please help :-( Reply to this Question
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female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (24 February 2011):
 Hmmm...this sounds like a case of insecurity on his part. You can reassure him that in going out with your buddies that those other guys aren't half as incredible as he is. Tell him that your there to enjoy time with your friends, not flirt with the guys.
He has to trust you, plain and simple. You need time with your friends, and he needs time to do things with his. What you feel is healthy.
He sounds like a great guy, but don't give into his insecurities trying to control you. You must feel free, and he must trust you 100% unless you actually give him reason not to.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (24 February 2011):
The problem with being young, is that you have so little experience with people. When I was 17, my girlfriend at the time was the Goddess - no one else was like her in my eyes. Then she cheated, and for a while I was single. Since then, I've met far better women, and now I look back and wish I'd had my eyes open!
Your boyfriend seems like the best guy. But in fact, he's not. He's miles away. It's a very bad sign that he doesn't like you going out, and does everything for you and such. That's not love - that's being possessive, that's being controlling. You SHOULD be able to go out with your friends and have fun, whatever your age. Clearly when you're in a relationship there is a limit (no cheating etc). But your boyfriend is acting controlling.
The fact is, you will meet other, less controlling and less insecure guys elsewhere in your life. Don't let a man control you. If he doesn't like you going out, and you don't live your life, then it will end within a few years anyway.
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