A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I've been with my boyfriend for 4 months, we are deeply in love, but there's a problem, I'm starting to feel guilty as I've been lying to him this whole time.Basicly he thinks I'm older than what I am, I'm starting to feel guilty for lying as I love him so much. He's 18 and I'm 16, I didn't think he would want a younger girl so I told him I was the same age as him. I really don't know what to as I don't want him to dump me.Please help me Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2008): Depending on where you live, he could be arrested and go to prison if you have done much more than hold hands. Better safe than sorry. Please learn your state laws. Many young men go to jail because they were having sex with underage females and didn't know she was underage. Most underage females have no idea they are putting their loved one in such a situation by lying about their age. If you love him, tell him the truth.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (26 March 2008):
Wouldn't it be better for him to hear this from you now, rather than later from someone else? I think you might be worrying too much about this, and it will change the way you act with him. He might sense you're hiding something bigger than this.
So do what you think is best, you've had some really good advice from all the people who answered your question. Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): I have always been told never to ask a girls age and ignore the response she give to someone who has asked her. I found this true from my teens to current, and that is about 40 years true. Most states do not have a problem with a 16 year old girl and 18 year old boy, but this would be the only concern he should have, no one wants to spend time in jail because of loving someone to young.
It is up to you whether you should tell him. After listening to the advice here, then make your decision on what you feel is right for you and him. I personally don't see it much of an issue, though I would think he might already know, because he maybe out of school and your still in school, or if your both in school, he may of noticed a few softmores you hang out with.
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A
female
reader, kirstylou +, writes (26 March 2008):
Hun, its best to tell him the truth now because the longer you leave it the worse it will get. Its only a 2 year age gap.. thats nothing to worry about, im sure he wont go funny with that.
I had it done to me, the guy lied to me about his age and didnt tell me after 4 months. i was shocked at 1st that he lied about something silly as that, but i got used to it in the end. Its not the age that affected me it was just him lieing. so yeh tell him as soon as possible and try not to worry.. just explain yourself to him, im sure he will understand
gd luck :) x x x
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A
female
reader, Harbbey3000 +, writes (26 March 2008):
well its really bad 4 u 2 build ur relationship on a lie,but he deserves 2 know d truth and the sooner u tell him d better 4 u and ur relationship,As 4 whether he will dump u or not,if he really luvs u he will stay with u
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): tell him the truth.
if he doesnt dump you sooner or later you will probably want to be married.
so either he will find out another way or he could know before hand.
its not against the law or anything.
so it should be fine.. if he really loves you he would think age is just a number and the only thing he should be mad about is that you lied about it.
wont he notice that you are in school?
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