A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend of 7 years chatted to women on chat pages, joined a sex chat site and looked at porn.I found out cus i snooped.I left him. Moved back to mums,gave my car up, the lot.Several months later, he promised to try and put things right. He didnt. Just worked all the time. No time 4 me.Then our 7 year anniversary came last friday - he 4got. Ive left. i cant do this anymore,but i love him. I need some help, advise, and no judging please
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2007): Ok...first I have to say "Good for you"...when i read this article I was on here trying to see if anyone out there is sharing what I was going through...and if we didnt live so far away I would swear we were w/the same guy. ( ahhahaha ) I just left my BF of 2 years for the exact same reason. I was so hurt and felt betrayed...I also left...we went back forth for a few weeks....but i knew I had the trust thing that was destroyed and as soon as i left his house i knew what he was going to be doing. Jumping on the pc for pron and ladies sites./chat rooms etc....I totally know what your going through...and i miss him and see all these girls chatting w/him on his tagged website and it hurts so bad. Makes me feel like I wasnt' good enough and all he use to say to me and accuse me of cheating it was all really him. I havent talked to him in a couple ofweeks...but i dred the day i run into him...i have some anger starting to surface and just want to tell him how i feel. I guess I didnt give any real good advice did i??? ahhah I feel your pain, and have done alot of reading...dont give into that sort of issue. You will always be wondering and its not worth your sanity. Someone out there will appreciate our core morals and we should NOT settle for garbage like that. Its actually a huge turn off....when I think about what he was doing when i wasnt there...
[email address blocked] is my email addy...give me a hollor if you want to chat. You DID THE RIGHT THING!!!! punch pillows, call friends and family, do not call him or give him your precious time.
A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (6 December 2007):
Poster, I don't think there is any reason for any of us to judge you or treat you harshly. Instead, I have to commend you on doing the right thing and being brave.
You love him, he doesn't. Instead of putting a facade, you ended it. You love him, but not the treatment he was giving you. And you were right in this.
I don't think you should try again. I don't think he is as interested in the relationship as you were. My advice is, stay the course. It will be difficult and painful, but it is the right thing to do.
Sooner rather than later, someone will come your way who will appreciate you as you deserve.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2007): I think you need to go through this pain which can be quite like grieving. Have loads of time to yourself and learn more about yourself. I spent over 4 years, just me and my son before i even met someone else. I was great, it builds character, strength and independence and certainly confidence. 7 years is a long time so let yourself health naturally and slowly and you will be ok, but you do deserve better and dont settle for anything less.
take care
xxx
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A
female
reader, Megan Deetes +, writes (6 December 2007):
You two need to sit down and talk? Was this porn thing the first problem, because maybe your relationship was going slightly flat because you two have been together for long. men forget things all the time and i can't talk :S I think that because the chatroom situation weakened your faith for him, you lost faith in him and refused to see his side when he forgot. leaving probably hurt you more than staying. Do you want what you had before the chatroom scenario? Or are you glad to be free?
If you want to move on go ahead and go out but theres always room for one last try, spice things up a bit i found this site:
http://www.allaboutyou.com/Relationships/youandpartner/puttingsparkback/
Good Luck and message me if you need further help :) xxxxx
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