A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, about a week ago I spent the night with a really good friend who i've known is a lesbian...we kissed, and I broke it as soon as it happened. I told her I didn't want to, we agreed it was an accident, we put it behind us..but I did want to. I actually wanted to kiss her. And I have feelings for herBut here's the thing, I'm really not lesbian/bi. I'm straight and I come from a super Christian family. My mom's already said she would not be okay with it if i were lesbian. What do I do? Am I bi? Can I just...ignore it? I'm so lost.
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female
reader, helphelp77  +, writes (26 March 2009):
You are still young and have a lot of time to figure these big questions out.It may feel like a massive deal, but if you are then one of the most painful things you can do is supress it. You could end up feeling quite alone, i've found myself in a similar situation.Homosexuality is nothing to be ashamed of. I'm sorry your circumstances mean that it's not accepted. However, you were born the way you are and 'ignoring' feelings if they are strong to keep other people happy is a selfless act but it's your life and your choices at the end of the day and your happiness is what's most important. You'll be more sure of who you are and what you feel only with time. It's an annoying fact of life that sometimes it doesn't matter how much you think something you can never reach a definitive conclusion. Find someone you can confide in, perhaps this girl and talk it out. Often problems seem bigger in your head before you talk them out to others and see that really it's not that bad at all!Good luck
A
female
reader, loving arms +, writes (24 March 2009):
'I come from a super Christian family' these are your words. Reading these words leads me to believe that you have been raised to believe that same sex relationships are wrong. This has/will have an impact on how you behave as an adult.
You may be bi/lesbian/straight. Sometimes we have to do what feels right for us. If kissing your girlfriend felt right then go with it. We all will say something in our lifetime that we're not to pround of. If you are gay your mum will remember what she's said to you and be sory for it. I expect your mum loves you deeply, your sexuality is only a tiny part of the lovely daughter you no doubt are.
If the opportunity arises for you to kiss your friend again, and you want to, then just go with it.
Good luck be happy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2009): Ignore the person above (no offense to them) - You might be bisexual, you might be straight, you might just like your best friend and no other girl, you might just like the idea of kissing her but no more. There is no black and white I'm afraid! The only advice I can give you is just to go with whatever you think will make you happy. Your parents are wrong, there is nothing abnormal about being attracted to someone of the same sex. Just go with whatever makes you happy, and there is no point in labeling yourself. Good luck :-) xx
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A
female
reader, revanchist +, writes (24 March 2009):
No, you are not bisexual. Kissing is a pleasurable activity, but has little to do with sexual orientation.
You probably just need a super Christian boyfriend.
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