A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I posted about two weeks ago a rant about breaking up with my bf. We'd been together for 4 years, and on new years eve i told him i didnt know what i wanted anymore an he agreed and after lots of tears we ended it. now he's sticking to it and i really want him back. it started off fine, we talked alot about how we wanted to remain friends etc, but as its gone on we're talking less and less, and he's getting wound up by me when i try and talk to him honestly about all this. I've told him i want him back but i've not forced it on him. I've told him how i'm coping but he wont talk to me.this weekend i went out with a few friends, and at the end of the night was left on my own, so i knew a coupleof people in a local bar who told me to meet them there. I turned up and my ex was there and before i even had chance to say hello he'd left, and text me having a go at me for being there.its getting harder and harder for me as time goes on. And when i think, oh i'm doing fine I've not been upset for nearly a week, something comes along and makes me cry for hours. i just wish he missed me like i missed him. i wish he wanted me back and still loved me the way i still love him. I'm finding it really hard to cope. I dont want to eat, i'm pounding the gym, i'm going shopping and now i have no money becasue all i want to do is find something to do to take my mind off it and it works for the moment but once its done i'm right back to wanting him.I really cant handle this. I dont just miss him as my bf , i miss my best friend. I just want to talk to him about all the crap things i'm going through with work and my family and he doesnt want to talk properly.how can i cope with this? two weeks feels like a lifetime. I'm a mess.
View related questions:
best friend, money, my ex, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2011): @ baby-blue-eyes,It seems the other way round to me.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo the reader who asks if there's someone else.. No there has never been "someone else" on his side or mine, and as I've said the reason I told him I didn't know what I wanted anymore was because I was so sick of trying to find ways to make him want me I just had enough. I wouldn't say that to him if I did want someone else and then expect him to come running back. Given the way he's been acting towards me these last few months, that's the last thing I would expect. I just wish he felt differently...
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just knew it was coming to an end.. He wasn't being as affectionate and I'm a really affectionate person. I just felt like his feelings for me had been changing for a while and I think he was plodding along whereas I was as in love with him as I always was. I wasn't happy being with someone who I felt didn't want to be with me and I was running out of ideas to make him stay. I think when I said it it was his way out and he's not looked back. I'm just finding it hard coping with the idea that someone who I've loved and been with for 4 yrs doesn't want me anymore. I don't know how to cope :(
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): He could well miss you,but he sounds very hurt and maybe you dont want to tell us in fear of serves you right echoing around the place.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): Has there been someone else but it didnt work out for you? He is behaving like someone hurt thats why I ask you. You may find the old saying "forgive and forget" is a saying used by people who hurt someone,but the ones who get hurt deep enough never truly do. You just may have lost what you had, even if you get back together,he will be waiting for your next mixed up moment. You didnt know what you wanted is just another way of saying theres others I want to sleep with,I want fun,that isnt wrong in itself,but dont expect open arms waiting for your disease free return,because it is never like that.
...............................
A
female
reader, baby-blue-eyes +, writes (16 January 2011):
guys actually take break ups harder than girls they just never show it and it doesnt hit them till weeks later then they get upset but he will never show it . all i can say is it will get better with time
...............................
A
female
reader, comeonjesusthishurtstoomuch  +, writes (16 January 2011):
 First of all i am so sorry your heart is breaking. Keep your head up this too shall pass. Whenever God closes a door he opens a window. There was a reason you said on new years you didn't know what you wanted anymore, please tell us what that was so we can better our advice.
...............................
|
