A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I was seeing a man who is 26. I am 37 with two kids who is recently seperated. We have hooked up a few times. text daily. The past week he seems cold and the texts are zero. He also was at my house and stayed over three times 2 weeks ago, but nothing since. I dont know what to think. I call and he dont answer. When I have texted its a quick answer and nothing more, but I have not text and either has he. I feel so used and not sure what the hell to do. I like him a lot, but he seems so up and down. Its been since march and he went 3 weeks without seeing me and boom over a few nights now nothing again. Why?? I am so sad over this and just want an answer. If he wants to stop this fling all together than be a man and tell me. Should I text him or just say forget it?
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male
reader, Serpico +, writes (13 June 2013):
Ok, a few things, and Ill get the blunt stuff out of the way first.For starters, a 26 year old man with anything on the ball is going to have A LOT of options. Life is all about options and choosing the best one. For most 26 year old men, a long term relationship with a 37 year old woman with another mans kids is not going to be one of the more attractive ones.Second, I warn you about seeing another man while you are separated. In many states, that could be seen by the court as adultery. Remember, separated = still married.Last, it sounds like you used each other for sex and its over. Stemming from my comment above, if thats what you want, you will find many men in their 20s willing to participate. If you want a relationship, you are likely going to have to change your demographic of who you date....
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (12 June 2013):
 I think you know this, it's pretty obvious that he has had his roll in the hay and looking for "greener" pastures.
IF he does contact you again my bet would be because he is horny and YOU are convenient & available.
If you don't mind being a casual romp them by all means keep trying to talk to him, but if you for one reason or another want something more... then stop texting him and block his number. Find someone who wants the same as you do.
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A
female
reader, Got Issues  +, writes (12 June 2013):
 You've got your answer already. The fact that he isn't contacting you means it's over. He's got what he wants. That's not to say he won't try again in the future, but for now he doesn't want anything else from you.
It's been mentioned already but bringing a guy you're "seeing" into your house and having sex with him when you have children is not a good idea. Maybe they weren't there, but I still think you should keep your home life and any dating separate.
Delete this guy from your life. It's not going to be what you want it to be, so make a decision that it's over and stick to it.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2013): Thas what I could never understand with women. It is so obvious that a 20 something years old ussualy will be in this only for sex. You are so much older, a family woman. That would be a highly unussual situation if he was serious about you. You guys had your fun, and then fun stopped because you feel used. Trust yourself, you don't need him to tell you it's over. You decide when it's over. Why would he even start telling you a so called truth. The truth is that he wants to show up when he is pleased. It suits him well, and may be he even thinks that it suits you well. May be he thinks that you understand he is too young for you to have a relationship, you indicated yourself there were just hook ups. May be he thinks its a perfect arrangement for you to have a young lover like him from now and then, and then go on with your life like nothing happened. You are the only one who knows how it makes you feel. And if it makes you feel used, then stop seeing him. You have the power to change this in a second. Just remember one thing: you can be in control of this particular situation. He is just a little episode in your life, nothing else.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2013): Just say forget it. He is blowing you off. He is probably dating someone else that is why he is not answering. And yes he will come around again. As soon as it doesn't work out with the current one he will come around again probably for sex and nothing more. If you "take him back" he'll sleep with you again for a short period and blow you off again. He is not answering nor offering an explanation for two reasons. 1. He doesn't feel he owes you an explanation since he is not your boyfriend and there was never a commitment. 2. He wants to keep you as an option for sex in the future. If he comes clean and tells you what is really going on (that he is sleeping with someone else) you may move on and he will no longer have you as a back up for sex. So as you see this guy is just using you.
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A
female
reader, Brokenv  +, writes (12 June 2013):
First and foremost you children are priority. Did your friend stay over while your kids were home? If he did that is not a good example for your children. Sorry but your priority is to set a good example for them. You have made a couple of contacts with this guy. He has not responded. The last couple of times you were together you he was cold. I think you have answered your own questions. Do not contact him. Have respect for yourself. You have started out on a new territory-just separated! Take care of your new life. Take care of your needs and your children's. You and your adjustment is way more important then any silly boy. He is not worth worrying over. You deserve someone who knows how to communicated with a wonderful woman. That is what you are and nothing less. Don't expect anything less in a partner. Good luck Chickie!
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (12 June 2013):
 Sorry but you have just been played. Time t do exactly what SVC said , block, block, block.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 June 2013):
 you do realize he's using you for sex right?
I would not text him.
IN fact, I would delete and block his number
and if he manages to get a hold of you, tell him it's over and done.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2013): Why wait for him to DECIDE YOUR LIFE? you decide if you are done! you decide if it's over! you decide if you are worth more than this! I think you are...toughen up or become a doormat that people just wipe their feet on when they are finished. Sorry to be so blunt, but why does your life hang in the balance of what he says or does?
Good Luck and hope you wipe your feet.
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A
female
reader, FreshPrincess +, writes (12 June 2013):
Just forget it. You don't need to be chasing some guy around. Find someone who shows the same level of interest. Just delete his number, and carry on with life. There are plenty of guys out there who would actually enjoy your company. He isn't one of them.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2013): if he contact you ever again (he will because he will want free easy sex) please you DO NOT replay. he doesnt want you. so why beg love/company to a such a bad/ugly man like him? be strong and dont leave a man treat you like a doormat.
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