A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've just started a long distance relationship and i'm already finding it really hard. He lives about 4 hours away on the train, and seeing as im still at school, I'm finding it dificult to find the money to go and see him.I really want it to work out between us, but I don't know what to do.Any advice?
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female
reader, bday121  +, writes (7 September 2007):
 I've been in a long distance relationship as well, and I know how difficult it can be. My ex boyfriend and I were together for 3 years this way in a lovely realtionship, so it *can* work. My biggest part of advice: telephone! Call each other all the time, at least once a day. It can get to be a bore, but if you two communicate regularly it'll strenghthen your realtionship. Just keep talking about anything and everything. Not only will you get to know this guy inside and out, but the conversations will also soften the heartache you'll sometimes get by being so far away. If you just stay dedicated and communicate often, your realtionship can work.
However, I think it's only right to point out something. The heartache you can get from being so far away is literally painful and can hurt the relationship. Ultimately, that was one of the reasons why my long-distance bf is now an ex.
A
female
reader, LethalInjection-x +, writes (4 September 2007):
 I'm in the same situation as you, my boyfriend lives about 3/4 hours away from me too. However, we've been going out for nearly 6 months now, so it can work.
Have you tried buying train tickets online? They're a lot cheaper than buying at the station, I've only just realised this, and saved myself £8 a trip.
Talk to your boyfriend about it, arrange a system of visits, say he comes one weekend, you go the next or possibly the one after, then his turn etc, so it's fair.
Speak to your parents and ask if he can stay over and suggest he does the same, this way, you get the most out of your train ticket.
&In between visits, try to keep in contact a lot, whether it's online, through texts, or phone calls.
If you really are struggling with money, why don't you explain to your mom/dad/guardian that you really want it to work between you and your new boyfriend, but to work it would mean visits, which would mean needing money, then ask if you could help around the house in order to "earn" the money for the train fare.
Hope that helps.
Good luck with your relationship, I hope it goes well :]
xx
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A
female
reader, Jessica-X +, writes (4 September 2007):
 If you want to work this out you are going to have to push yourself. You can email him everyday, if that helps and you could each go on MSN at a serten time of the day (if you have MSN). You could go up and see him in your school holidays or go up and see him at a weekend (you could make it a long-weekend if you would like (sleepover as it is a long journey)).
[= Jessica =]
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