A
female
age
36-40,
*tagit
writes:I just recently started talking to my ex again, but I have a fiance, how do I chose the right choice?I have been dating my fiance for 2 and a half years now. My family loves and I do, too. But just recently my ex started talking to me again and old emotions surfaced back up and now I think I am in love with him all over again. My fiance and I always argue, my ex and I never. My ex does a lot just for me and I am starting to realized it. He quit smoking for me and he does everything he can to make me happy. My fiance on the other hand, makes me happy when he actually pays attention (this is true too) or when he wants a peice of me, thats if he is not playing a video game. What should I do? I am wanting to make both of them sit together with me and discuss things, is that a good idea? Then I told my fiance what is going on (he has the right to know) and I want him to make the desicion if he still wants to be with me or not. But I am afraid of what my family will think of me if I go back to the ex, especially my mother. She was the reason why my ex and I broke up in the first place. Please help, someone!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, NITRAM BLUE  +, writes (16 January 2009):
 “I just recently started talking to my ex again, but I have a fiancée, how do I chose the right choice? “
The right choice is to follow what your heart tells you. If you spend a little time off, let us say for a day to listen to your heart. Then an answer will emerge. It is like soul searching. Who among the two gentlemen is the right choice for you, whom do you, love best?
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“What should I do? I am wanting to make both of them sit together with me and discuss things, is that a good idea? “
I believe you are the one who is confused, not them. What issue should they talk about, if such would happen? It is a bad idea considering there is nothing and not a contention on what will be discussed.
They are not in conflict with each other but it is you who must decide to let one go and accept the other. Your decision is based solely on who really won your heart. That decision is for you and you alone to make.
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I have seen a lot of people make the poor decisions because they did not listen to their hearts. Some listened to the warning of friends, to the guidance of strangers, to the insistence of their parents and forgot that in themselves they have a heart to listen to.
Love is not hate. If you hate one, then you do not love that person. You have mentioned a lot about the misgivings of your present fiancée which I presumed that you are rooting for your ex-boyfriend to be a suitable replacement. Then, you have made a decision but you are not sure if your decision is correct that is why you have created a thread in the hope of verifying if your decision is what you believe to be is correct.
I would like to believe that you are torn between two lovers but the way I see it, you are leaning for another lover but unsure if this is the right move.
Will you be happy with your present fiancée or your ex-boyfriend? Do you love your present fiancée or your ex-boyfriend? If the three of you are in a doomed ship, who will you save first, your present fiancée or your ex-boyfriend? Deep in your heart, you know the answers for you to make a decision.
This decision to choose is yours and yours alone. Nobody on earth can make that for you. Whether the outcome of your decision turns out poorly, at least you did it in the name of LOVE.
In 1936, Edward VIII abdicated the British throne in order to marry Wallis Warfield Simpson, an American divorcee – the woman he loved.
LOVE is all that matters.
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