A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: I just lost the love of my life I'm so sad. I can't believe he said we should go our own way. I feel dead, my heart is broken. I really love him. How do I get over him? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, No watered down advice here! +, writes (31 October 2010):
You're so...VERY!!! Welcome.
A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (31 October 2010):
At your age, it seems like its the end of the world - it not. I had at least 5 "love of my lifes." I dont think about any of them now, and am unbelievably happy that I didnt end up with any of them.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI feel so down, i can't even think straight. I want to get over him so bad...But thank you all for the advice and comments very helpful!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): well you are good enough. its his lost and he doesn't deserve you.
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A
female
reader, No watered down advice here! +, writes (31 October 2010):
Now, To answer your question on how to over him. All I can say to is the same thing I said to my grand daughter, Which is: 1.) Never,try to replace him, he's unique, he can't be replaced.Stay busy.
2.)Don't call him,if he told you it's over then let it be OVER!
3)Number 2,is going to be hard to DO! but I'm the ADULT! and I will never tell you anything wrong!
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A
female
reader, No watered down advice here! +, writes (31 October 2010):
I have a 13yr.old grand daughter going through her first love break-up,as well. So..When I seen your question I had to grab it and just send you a really (((BIG HUG))) Did you get it? Smile* It'll it better..You feel like he's the "LOVE THE OF YOUR LIFE" now. One day you'll look back at this day and say...I never thought I would get over HIM! But I did! Keep smiling!
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A
female
reader, glassblower +, writes (31 October 2010):
When I was your age my first love was in a car accident and died...it's very painful but I promise it heals with time. Do whatever you need to make yourself more comfortable until it heals. Good luck sweetie.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): It's hard when you lose someone that you love. But you can't dwell on it. Go out and have fun, your still young and you have a life time ahead of you to find someone that will be there for you and love you as much as you love them.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): So sad, but so inevitable. This is normal, to have one person love the other person far more than the other person loves you back. Better to discover it now and now, and not until 25 years later. And such a pity that children are thinking they need a sexual partner to look cool or cute. It's not cool and not cute, it's an embarrassment to see far too young children 'falling in love', wasting time that should be used on studies, getting fit, reading, discussing concepts, watching, learning, observing people to learn more about life by observation. when still a young teenager your emotions and life experience are not yet up to discerning why it's not cool and not cute and not smart to get into a relationship when you are so young. . Smart boys and smart girls around your age get on with their school work. The not so smart boys chase for skirt, looking for likely targets = Girls they can, as soon as possible, experiment with, sexually. It's all a game to the boys. Let the boys experiment with girls who are happy to be discardable experiments. Wait a few years before you start to consider boys. You will get over this boy, and be wiser and better for it. Boys' actions tell you the depth of their feelings. And believe me that depth, at this time, is pretty shallow. They have to learn a lot more to be a man. It's a hard lesson and i am so sorry you are going through that pain. But this real pain is what girls go through daily after they are dropped. Boys are so fickle at your age. These boys enjoy the power they find in their hands to get girls to the stage where the girl is swooning breathless about the boy. But to the boy it is a conquest game. The boys seek, get the girl interested, get all they find the girl will give out, then the novelty of the girl wears off. They then move on to search for their next conquest and trophy. At your age you are but a mere fleeting trophy to a boy. You have heard his words, experienced the power of his boyish charm. And deeply felt passions in your heart are normal at this young time in your life. But you are too young to be contemplating developing it more. And you should leave your options open for the future by concentrating on getting the best grades at school.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (31 October 2010):
Oops, sorry, I just realized he broke up with you because he said you should both go your separate ways........but you know, its pretty normal not to be exclusive with any one person at your young age. You both need to see lots of different people as a way of finding out who you will be best suited to date, later on in life....
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): When I was your age I had a girlfriend who lived a distance from me and she said it can't work because of the distance, I can remember how I felt way back then and I've never forgotten her, but you are at the start of your romantic life, you will meet many others and you will fall in love again, but it may take a little time for you to really understand what a lasting love is.The pain you feel is a lesson in life, it hurts now but it will make you a stronger person in time to come, the only cure for heartache is time and good friends to support you, but I know, when you're alone at night you will think of your lost love and only you can deal with that as best you can, it will all work out for you, but it does take time, I'm sorry to say....there is an old saying and it's so true "times a great healer"
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (31 October 2010):
Aw honey. That's very hard esp. at your age. It may seem impossible to believe right now, but you know, its really NOT the end of the world. (I'm guessing you didn't lose him due to death??)
Just grieve for a while, and then try to get back involved in your schoolwork - you'll definitely need to do at least THAT - and hang out with your friends. Get into activities you've always enjoyed, whether its playing volleyball, reading, movies, whatever.......
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe likes another girl she's so much prettier than me. I feel so ugly and not good enough :(
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): aw hunny, i feel for u, nearly all of us have been there . I dont want this to sound patronising but you are young. Very few ppl find their true love at your age and even tho it may not seem like it now, time heals pain. Spend as much time as u can with ppl that care about you. Your mum n dad, ur sis, ur best mate whoever is best for u, and tell them how u feel and that ur hurting. They will understand because like i said alot of us have been there many times over and will no how it feels. Talking helps, i promise. X feel better soon hun
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