A
female
age
26-29,
*orserider96
writes:Here's the whole story. I met this guy when we started secondary school together (we were both 11) and we had a sort of thing going on. We were both too young to know what we actually wanted and both were too immature to think about having a relationship with anyone. Anyhow he left when we were about 13 to go and live in Germany and I didn't hear from him for 2 years (didn't have facebook or his email so couldn't talk to him ) but then last year, I got his email at last and we finally started talking and in a year he has become one of my best friends and me his. I think I love him and my friends say that he pretty obviously really likes me (and I think this is true =P) but anyway basically we would talk almost every night for hours and I got to know him really well all over again and we both realize that we have grown up (we're both 16 now) and matured (I'm not saying we're mature adults or anything) from when we were 11. A year after we started talking to each other he came back to england for this goodbye party our whole year was having and he stayed here for about 2 weeks. Basically by the 2nd day we had already kissed and stuff and for the first week and most of the second we went on loads of dates, alone and with our friends and it was just perfect.The penultimate day was the day I lost my virginity to him. I just went round to the hotel where he was staying with his family (they were all out) and one thing led to another and we had sex. He didn't pressure me or anything, but we just did it and I must admit it was one of the best moments of my life. Aftewards we were both in quite a haze and didn't really talk about why we did it we just carried on as we usually do.The thing is, tomorrow he is leaving to go back to Germany and he's been texting me all night to talk to him but I just don't know what to say so haven't replied.I don't regret losing my virginity to him but the fact that we aren't going out and he's going back to Germany makes me feel like I've done something horribly wrong.What should I do now?? Please help
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female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (13 December 2011):
 Honestly you havent done anything wrong - I think you are just upset that the guy you have a really special connection with is leaving again.
Losing your virginity to someone you really care about is no bad thing, it is so much better than losing your virginity to some stranger when drunk at someone's house party (like most teenagers these days!).
Try and relax and reply to his text, dont make him think that you are angry with him because that is not fair to him. If you just relax and see where it goes, then everything will be fine. Yes he lives a long way away, but I'm sure he will come back to visit again, and you can visit him too - so carry on as you were but knowing that you have this special connection that cant be forgotten.
Only time will tell with this relationship, you never know what the future holds - but at least you can be sure that you had a wonderful first time and you are both very special to each other.
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2011): you have done nothing wrong -- it sounds like you two really really have a connection. I think ti is best to reply to him, if you wish to have a relationship with him at any point in your future. what he is probably thinking right now is that you don't care...and I can tell that you do! Life throws us curveballs and if you feel as though holding ont him and having him in your life would be worth it, than act on it. Who knows what the future will hold! you're still very young :)
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