A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My partner and I get along well enough. But, I just don't feel that BUZZ anymore. I have a hard time relating to him and don't know why everything (for me) seems more difficult than it should be with him. We didn't start off like this and I don't like how I'm feeling about our relationship.I don't have fun w/ him anymore and it's really hard for me to laugh anymore with him. I have better conversations and connections w/ my male friends. How do I change this? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionGina, it IS 80% of why I feel the way I do. We've discussed it before and I decided to let it go, but I don't feel that way now. He thinks it's resolved and for me it isn't...This is a lot of why I feel the way I do.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you, Gina and Caring Guy, for your thoughtful answers. My emotional distance has become greater because we are one of those 'opposites attract' relationships. I avoid political & philosophical discussions (which were one of the things that strongly attracted us to each other) because our views are SO different, they make me question how we fit together. So, we end up talking about work and the weather. I feel no intimacy because of our differences and then there's the porn thing...I am just shutting down and very sad. I feel stuck and don't know what to do.
I don't want to break up. Counseling isn't helping and I don't feel the friendship between us, the partnership. He does and I don't know how to get it back. I just don't feel emotionally secure in my relationship with him, even though he treats me like a princess and is a great guy...
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 October 2009):
What was it that gave you that initial 'buzz'? Lots of couples go through this stage, where suddenly everything becomes normal. It can be fixed, because if you find out what the buzz was, then you'll be able to recreate it. Try spending more time together and finding out about each other again.
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