A
female
age
41-50,
*acheyroo
writes:i rang my boyfreind early this morning becouse he was stopping at his mum becouse he had had a drink with his friend and i couldent get him a taxi back.when i rang his phone it answerd and i heard him say turn that off but obviously he answerd it by mistake and i heard him haveing sex with some one.i listend to the whole thing. what do i do we have three children together i feel weird becouse i havent even cried. i think i feel numb but now i think how often has it been hapening? am i just stupid are all men just cheats? do i egnore it becouse hes denying it? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2010): you just cant ignore this.. it wouldnt be fair on your children or you if you were to sit back and let him get away with this! u have to make the right decision for the sake of your family!! u probably havent cried yet because your probably in shock! i say you thought that he wasnt capable of cheating on you! im so sorry you had to find out the way you did! have it out with him and take it from there but dont let him talk you around! he has committed adultery there is no excuse!
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (11 April 2010):
Dump, dump, dump. This isn't even worth bothering about. At all. Get rid of him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2010): I dont think having the kids makes it anymore difficult. He was/is cheating. It's real, you heard for yourself, so where is the question here? You have to ask yourself if you are willing to be in a relationship where cheating is acceptable. Are you okay knowing that he does not care about you the way you care about him? I would imagine that you want an equal relationship, so how are you going to get that?Most people know that once a person cheats he/she has emotionally checked out of the relationship anyway. Either that or he was never really in it to begin with. What is better for you kids: having a mom who respects herself and knows that she deserves better, thus showing them that they deserve better too OR having a mom who is submissive and willing to allow herself to be emotionally beaten down, thus showing them that perhaps they are lesser too? Leave him and make a better life for yourself nd your kids.
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A
female
reader, LoveGirl  +, writes (11 April 2010):
i agree with BimBim. how can you just ignore it. whether he denys this til kingdom come, you know what you heard. when you speak to some people their cheating partners make them think they are slowly going mad even though they know the truth. it is this denial that the cheater assumes will get him off the hook. i know having 3 kids makes it very difficult to want to up and leave or even throw him out. you need to make some decisions - 1stly, it is a fact that he is enjoying sexual priviledges with other/s, so get a std/sti checkup. whether he is using condoms is not the issue, you can never be too safe nowadays.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (11 April 2010):
 How can you ignore it?
Same think happened to me, but I forgave him that time, and the next and also the time after that.
However, it finally got to a stage where it was ignore again or go nuts, I decided to save myself and got out of the relationship. Sure, it took me a while to get over it all, but my kids (I had two boys one girl) have all turned out to be fantastic people, my life is back on track, I have a job I love (it took a while to get it, and lots of crummy jobs in between), I am in my 50s, my lifestyle is good, in the past 12 months I have taken 2 overseas trips and plan a trip to Europe in a few months.
Not all men are cheats, only you can decide whats best for you and your children, why not go and seek some legal advise before you make a decision. Take care of yourself first.
Good luck
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