A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have always been friendly with a man 10 years older than me. I really wish he would see me as more than a friend. He is a single parent with a mixed race son. That is not be a problem to me. When I first got to talk proper with him, he did say he would never date a white girl because it would be unfair on his son and make him grow up with an identity crisis. I used to hero worship him when i was young but I would have been too young for him back then. I also remember his son's mother was by far not the first black girl he dated. Do you think he only likes black girls or does his reason make sense? I know in the UK that adoption agencies do tend to work by same race adoptions. He doesnt know how I feel and I have never told him. Shall I just give up before making a fool of myself? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2011): i dont think youre his type. he may have told you that because he sensed you wanted more and didnt want you to take it personal.
A
female
reader, thinkb4  +, writes (26 November 2011):
He wont be interested,he`s a man and you would have known by now if he was. His opinion is arguably right,but his racial preference doesn`t matter as he only seems to see you as a friend. If you cannot manage just being a friend to him you would be better staying away from him for a while.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (26 November 2011):
 I wouldn't tell him how you feel, it wouldn't do you any good as he isn't interested in you like "that". He just can't see you as anything else but a friend. If it is too hard for you to be his friend" only" then you need to let him go.
I don't think his reasons make sense, no matter what country you live in, but I'm not him. If that is what he believes, then that is what he believes. Also, it might be that he simply prefer black girls, nothing wrong in that either.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2011): He wouldn't make such a statement if he saw anything between you two happening. You need to find someone else. I aree with him on principle. I dont believe people can only be attracted to a specific race outside their own. In his situation its probably more sensible doing what he believes.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2011): It may be better you move past it. You could still tell him how you feel about him though and see what he says. To put it in a shell,he does have a true point if his son is still a young child.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2011): You must understand him on this. I have never thought about this before,but he is limiting his own chances by putting his son first and i beleive what he has said is true. I would say you need to move on from wanting something what wont ever happen.
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