A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:WHEN I tell my girlfriend I don’t love her, she says I just don’t try hard enough.The truth is I have fallen for another guy.I am 34 and live with my girlfriend, who is 31.We have a son and a daughter. We share a home but don’t have a sexual relationship now. My wife hasn't really been interested in sex. No, don't blame the menopause, 20 years too young for that.I’m with her for the kids’ sake.I have been battling with my sexuality and now I have fallen for a wonderful guy – he’s handsome, successful and understanding about my situation. We have become very special to one another. He's an American living in London, and he's 5 years older than me.We've dated since Freedom Day when we met; yes, the first one last year, not the second one this year when all restrictions ended for good.He feels I should be honest with myself and with my girlfriend. I worry she might shut me out of the kids’ lives.There's also another issue; the American guy also wants me to move in with him soon.He lives in a small flat, but I have a house and wouldn't have anywhere to fit everything, plus what about my car too?I hate not being able to drive and don't like the London transit system really.This guy is a nice guy and he's been here for 6 years apparently.I do like him but also want to be a good dad to my kids.What I don't know is how to deal with my emotions or other things. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2022): You are not with your "wife" for the kids' sake but for your sake. Until you met this guy it gave you much of what you wanted out of life and you would have been alone with a great deal more expense otherwise.
A
female
reader, Stoneruby  +, writes (28 May 2022):
 If not for you, end it for her. It sounds like you have checked out of the relationship which is one thing. Coming to the realization you are gay or bisexual and acting upon it I, I can only imagine, liberating and exciting for you, your a cheater lets face it, so your wife is going to dealing with another whammy on top of finding out your sexual preference. Your role as a father doesnt change. be good to your kids its your job regardless of whats probably going to be a messy fall out with her. How does he feel about you having kids and your relationship. Is he prepared for that in the relationship? what will that look like for you if you are intending to move in together. The car and commute is the least of your problems to be honest. Talk to her and a family lawyer. Start planning for all that you anticipate to go wrong and come to the decision that you cant fit a square into a round hole. Time to rip the band aid off regardless of this ne relationship you find yourself in
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (27 May 2022):
 Is she your wife or GF?
I think you need to pay more attention when you do these creative writing tasks....
"I am 34 and live with my girlfriend, who is 31."
"My wife hasn't really been interested in sex. "
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