A
male
age
30-35,
*ay124
writes:Hi, i have a question about a long distance relationship. i just started college around 8 weeks ago and so did my girlfriend. We go to college in different states very far away from each other. We have been dating over a year and it has been the greatest year of my life, i love her with all my heart. so far, we have been doing ok, missing each other a lot obviously, though one boy did come onto her and she felt feelings for him too.when she told me about this, i was deeply hurt, but we are past it now. we will be at these colleges for 4 years. we both believe we can make it through, but i was wondering if anyone had any advice.i am seeing her soon and we plan on losing our virginity, (condoms already purchased) it will be the first time i have seen her in around 2 months.
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female
reader, Lost19  +, writes (23 October 2009):
 I wish you the best of luck, and i am rooting for you and your girlfriend and I believe long distance relationships can last.....but I think you should hold on to the sex part. Just because(in my opinion) if you both loose it to each other, when shes gone again your going to get very very very attached to her( more then you already are), and if your the jealouse type I dont think youll be able to stand it. Good Luck =)
A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (17 October 2009):
 Yes I do,
LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS RARELY WORK ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE IN COLLEGE AT DIFFERENT PLACES.
So let me ask you...I take it this is your Freshman year for both of you? First time away from home? She has feelings for this guy she sees every day while you are a few states away.
Ok, that being said, and the obvious (communication, trust, etc).
You are looking way too far into the future. It is your college experience and I am afraid that if you think with all the temptation on a college campus that you or your GF will be together or that another on of these incidents does not rear its ugly head in the next 4 months, much less the next 4 years, you are going to be disappointed.
People here are going to tell you that it can be successful, and indeed it can. But I will let you know you have about a 5 percent chance of being together in 4 years and about a 1 percent chance that either of you are going to keep your hormones in check when you go out to that Friday night party at the Frat House. A raging Kegger...a little glance back and forth...and then a little shag at the dorm. Just waiting for the Xmas break to drop the bomb
Too much temptation, young man. Too many young people with real tight bodies and real low tolerance for drugs and alcohol will most likely be the end of this relationship.
I know you didn't want to hear that, but you can always have hope.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): Long distance relationships CAN work. It takes so much effort but I assure you that if you both can make it through those 4 years and find a way to live near each other again, your relationship will be very much worth it and the bond will be stronger. The 4 years that you guys are apart may cause many issues like distrust. It's normal and if you guys really love each other you will have to just get through it. Seeing each other as much as possible is recommended too :)
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (16 October 2009):
The important thing is that you really make sure she knows she's loved. LDR's take a lot of effort and can survive, but only if you're both committed. Make sure she's relaxed, knows that you don't just want her for sex, and spend time talking to her and making her comfortable. All the best.
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