A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Ok, I'm 21 and have a great boyfriend who would do anything for me and always treats me right blah d blah but I can't help to think im gay. I work in the usual workplace where everyone is bitchy and stubborn! however there is this new girl and I seem really attached to her. I have never actually been out with a girl before but I did wonder when I was at school whether or not I liked women. This girl, named X is really , really nice. We get on really well and always have a laugh. I flirt like mad when we are together and she is really funny so we’re always laughing. If my boyfriend found out he would be really hurt so I don't know what to do. How should I know if this girl likes me? She is texting me and that and when she first did I put a kiss at the end, she didn't on the reply but then after she did. She flirts back and that and I reckon something will happen. I find myself feeling protective of her too, I really think she is something special so I am always trying to touch her and that and she laughs it off. She is single, I think so I reckon she does like me. I don’t want to ask her because she gets embarrassed easily and I don’t want to lose my bf if things don’t work out
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female
reader, Sexybum +, writes (21 March 2006):
Hello I'm just wonderring.... I've read a similar question;
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-really-like-this-girl-at-work-and.html
Take a look, could it be the girl you fancy who posted the question? Even if its not I still think you should read what her replies were.
You have to make up your mind, and if you do make a move on this girl you should split up with your boyfriend first, and do not go running back to him if she turns you down!
I don't mean to be harsh, but you have a desision to make and I'm afraid that if you are going to avoid breaking any hearts, it has to be one or the other. You can't have the best of both worlds!
1) You forget about the girl, everyone can have a crush regardless if they are in a relationship or not, and start working on making your relationship more exhilirating.
2) You split up with your boyfriend and persue a relationship with the girl you fancy (I would advise leaving a gap between the split and starting a new relationship-designed for getting your feelings in check) You run the risk of her turning you down and then being single, but thats what gambling and life is all about.
Decisions are what make our life and we all learn by oour acheivements and our mistakes!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2006): To be honest you really need to ask yourself do you love your boyfriend, can you see yourself spending the rest of your life with him or do you see yourself with this girl instead? I suggest writing the good points and the bad points down on a peice of paper about both of the people that you are confused about, for example," who do you have more fun with"?" who do you find yourself more attracted too"?" who do you see yourself being with in the future"?Just writing them down so that its written in front of you might actually give you a clearer view on what you really feel, and who its really for. I know it cant be an easy thing to do and i can see that you dont want to hurt your boyfriend but you cant help how you feel, if you find that you really like the girl more then its a chance you have to be willing to make, if your boyfriend really loves you and cares about you like you say he does then sit him down and explain what your feeling and he should understand, you cant live your life wondering "what if" and being unhappy because you dont want to hurt your boyfriend because thats not fair on yourelf either. Life is a gamble of making choices and sometimes they are hard ones that we have to make in order to have a happy life, and if you do loose your boyfriend through this then it wont be easy but you are only 21 and you have your whole life ahead of you, just try and enjoy it, have fun and take chances, once you realised who your heart is pointed toward. i hope this helps you x
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