A
female
age
41-50,
*essicaxoxo_love
writes:I have a huge crush on my friends boy friend and I'm trying to avoid from getting jealous,but every time I go home I start crying.can someone help me with my problem or help me avoid getting jealous?I want to tell her that I like him but I'm scared something is going to happen,btw I have really horrible problems
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2015): Whatever your horrible problems are, I suggest you seek some form of support like counselling to work through them. Anyone thinking rationally and healthy wouldn't go and cry about a crush on their best friends bf. It's not healthy to live like that.
You need to focus on your life, your interests meeting other people yourself. Telling your friend you fancy her boyfriend is just creating drams and likely to ruin the friendship.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2015): Don't spend any time with him if it upsets you this much.
And no don't tell your friend. Why would you? You are allowed to be attracted to adults. You simply shouldn't act on it and you are fine.
Spend time with her but not with him.
Try to deal with your other problems because it's not normal to cry because you are crushing on someone.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (4 September 2015):
 Jessica? You are too old for that teenage stuff.
You don't go around telling your friends that you are crushing on their BF's... SERIOUSLY. And crying because you are jealous?
IF you can't handle being around him/her - back off from them a while - GET BUSY with YOUR life. Maybe even find a counselor and deal with some of those horrible problems you are talking about.
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A
female
reader, Kingu  +, writes (4 September 2015):
 Please do not think I am being heartless, I myself have had more than my fair share of lusting after forbidden fruit but you said "crush" and "like". You are a sensible woman and you couldn't bring yourself to use the word love because that is not what you feel for this man. This is a infatuation that you have and infatuations never last. If you tell your friend that you are interested in her boyfriend you are immediately risking that friendship. You have to ask yourself how much you value your friendship? how much does your friend mean to you?If you want to avoid feeling jealous and want to make the crush disappear faster have a gossip with your friend, bring up "Men are from mars" conversation and listen to her list all his faults. Once you get an idea of the real him the fantasy figure you see him as will vanish.
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