A
male
,
anonymous
writes: hello agony auntsi have had a crush for my cousin for more than 2 years now and they are not going away, my problem now is that i have been dreaming about her and she is also going around my head 24/7, is this normal, as i have asked once but got turned down for my looks and sometimes i just wanna tell her again that i love her to bits. should i ask her again or just act like i do not like her?thank you for any advice that you give
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female
reader, batman +, writes (17 March 2007):
If you think she likes you now then ask her out but don't get your hopes up because if she does say no then you won't be that sad/depressed-Good Luck!!!
A
male
reader, Dr. John +, writes (18 February 2007):
I know exactly how you feel and it is not an easy thing to have to deal with.
We did everything together from the time she was three and I was four, till the time we got separated in our mid teens. Every chance we got to see each other we jumped at it. We could tell each other our innermost secrets. We learned what little boys and girls looked like while very young. But through all this we did keep the proper prospective. We gave each other kisses on the cheek and hugs and we absolutely loved each other equally.
When her family moved away I was devistated. I heard little of her after that until I heard about ten years ago that she had some kind of surgery and died at home. Her husband found her in her bed and she had bled to death.
I was emotionally stabbed in the heart.
No, a crush is not abnormal and yes you can tell her you love her. But always remember as I did, she is your cousin and you can never have anything good come out of any relationship with your cousin should you let it get out of hand. There will be consequences. So YOU need to make the decision. Can you stop and not cross the line with her. As I said, I never crossed that line and I treasure the times we were together. Now that she is gone I miss her, but one thing is for sure, I never had a better friend. Doc.
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A
female
reader, luvme247 +, writes (18 February 2007):
I think that you have done your part by telling her in the past how you feel about her. She already knows that you are into her & if she changes her mind & decides that she likes you back, she will make the next move. If you ask her again you may loose her as a friend. She may distence herself from you because you keep thinking that her friendly acts of kindness means that she likes you when that is clearly not the case here. I think that you need to move on before you loose a friend.
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A
female
reader, batman +, writes (17 February 2007):
no offence but why the hell do you have a CRUSH on your COUSIN? now look thats kinda nasty to like your cousin but if you really like her then go for it if she turns you down again then just try to find someone else to like or love for that matter.
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (17 February 2007):
I agree with Kenny here love. You've already asked her out and she turned you down. No amount of pandering after her will change that, it will only make her go off you even more. Take the initiative here, do your own thing, go out with other girls, who knows it might even make her jealous and she'll change her mind. Look to see if there are ways you can enhance your appearance, new clothes, new image etc. Even if you don't win her over, the new image will boost your confidence. Be her friend for now, things might change in the future as you both grow and mature but for now I'm afraid it seems no go!
Eve
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionbut now shes changed a bit, i think she kind of has feeling for me but doesnt want to bring it out as she gets a lot of boyz, and also in our religion it would be best to marry a cousin.. plus she is related to me through grandad, as ma grandad n hers r bro, so she aint ma first cousin.
i really do love her and theirs nothing i can do, tried to let go but couldnt
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (17 February 2007):
You have already asked her out once, so the likelihood of her having changed her mind if you ask her again is somewhat romote.
I know its hard when you have feelings for someone, and you don't want to let it go, but i think on this one you are going to have to.
If she did return your feelings i feel it would be very arkward with her being your cousin, i thinks it abit to close to home. There are plenty of girls out there for you, and more importantly ones you are not related to.
Good luck
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