A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So of course Im in love with a guy who I hate more than anything. Yes I said it, I think I hate him more than I love him but I always stay,take him back, forgive him etc.Long story short, we met when we were teenagers (13-14 yrs old) ended up taking each others virginities blah blah blah first love etc. We had a daughter when I was 15 he was 17, I finished highschool went on to college he dropped out and didnt do anything. I still loved him.He is a great father, but a horrible boyfriend. Dont get me wrong he tries however all the resentment I have towards him just doesnt even give him a try. So, let me explain why I have this resentment.I am the average 21 year old, college educated (still enrolled) woman who does it all! I have a great job, a fabulous car, and my own home. Through out all this success he did not help me too achieve none of it, however I still love him.He ended up around the wrong crowd of friends and started using heavy drugs. So basically, while I was working and going to school, he was out getting high and living the party life. So, because of the neglect, I ended up having my own little fun. I had an affair for a year straight .. He never knew until recently (I told him). But he did have his speculations, I mean he seen texts, calls, and the change in my act and sexual behaviors towards him. I ended up breaking up with him because he wouldnt stop the drugs and get his life together. So, of course that very first week of us breaking up he goes out and sleeps with a white girl he knew for 2 days. It was strange to me because I was his first and his only, so yes it hurt to have him share what we were only supposed to share with one another. HOWEVER!!!!The entire time we were broken up, he would not stop blowing my phone up, harrassing me at work, harrassing my family and friends and stalking my home to get back with me. I listened to him cry for an entire month!!!! So, what did I do?? I took him backEver since then .. the only thing that has changed is his attitude. He is more intuned to me, and what im doing, he is always cleaning, he trys to cook, he expresses his love to me everyday, and better yet .. He is a cry baby! He crys whenever I do not show him any attention, this is new by the way.Me? Well lets just say im more of a itch .. I do not care about anything anymore, I do not care what he tells me, i do not care if he goes out, i do not care if his phone is constantly going off or if he is constantly in his phone or on facebook. I can careless .. why? Because I know what I can have and what I can achieve without him. I also know that he is not the only one that i can have and who wants me. So why care about something that was already ruined the first time? Please answer that question
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female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (27 January 2012):
 Maybe because he is the father of your child and your first boyfriend.
However, be that as it may, why on earth do you stay with him? surely you can do MUCH better!
His refusal to accept your decision to drop him; harrassing your family and friends - CONTROLLER! You ought never to have taken him back. Tell us, has he contributed ANYTHING financially to supporting yours and his child? Legally, he is supposed to you know.
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