A
male
age
30-35,
*likesexytime22
writes:Hello,I've been dating my highschool sweetheart for the past going on three years of college. She is about an hour away at a different college, however hopefully transferring here. Im truly in love with this girl and I would like to spend the rest of my life with her.The only problem is the sex, it's not like it used to be. Not as frequent nor quite as good. Its almost as if she doesn't ever want to kiss me anymore, no more of that kiss turns into a makeout which turns into sex.....that fluid and great transition that usually occurs.Now it is more or less me having to ask her id like to make out for her even to do it, I just want her to really really want it, I hate being rejected and whenever she turns me down im very upset.My sex drive is quite high, as was hers in the beginning. I feel like once whatever change occured i tried pressuring her into it and trying new positions....etc and that was exactly the opposite of what i should have done. I said some untrue things like i need to orgasm every night and such that i think really hit her hard home.SInce than, I have tried a new statement to try and fix this and told her we should have no sex for a month until our anniversary. I figured this would help both of us but more specifically me to learn how to hang out with her on a day to day basis and expect nothing. I knew the anniversary sex would be good, and spent alot of time securing a nice dinner place and two presents for her (one materialistic and one i made). However she seemed to have not put as much effort into our anniversary and forgot some critical components for our sex.I really love this girl, and right now im trying the exact opposite where im going to not try as hard and see if she sees how much she misses me etc, i think if i reject her too a few times like saying im too tired for sex (which i never, ever , am) it may make her more prone to doing it or at least put me in control a bit. What do ya'll think? any suggestions help.Oh yes, also another variable that comes into play is i see her three days about every two weeks; so im really concerned in bringing this back right before she ends up living down here with me. I am a patient man and just want to get back to the old hot habits we had
View related questions:
anniversary, orgasm, sex drive Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2011): "told her we should have no sex for a month until our anniversary"
Sex shouldn't be like that, it should be easy, and fun, and spontaneous at this point. Stop trying to control it like that. If you spend time with her, enjoy it whether sex takes place or not. If you get her to enjoy her days with you, consistently, and don't make her feel pressured, and make her feel attractive (not by buying things but by telling her how beautiful she is and how good she makes you feel by just being with you) then you will see what she is like unpressed.
Don't work to "impress" her, work to "unpress" her and make her feel comfortable, competent, attractive, and secure in the relationship.
A
male
reader, df30 +, writes (12 January 2011):
Yeah dude you might be pushing her a little much with the sex. Sounds good, sex is, bring it up and tell her that you feel like shes not interested see what she has to say...Don't play mind games females are waaaayyy better at that shit than you are!
...............................
|
