A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am 45 just divorced and met this man. He seems genuine and caring and loving. I've been unhappy for a long time in my marraige for years. So I decided to go for this man. I had sex with him on the first night out. It's something I've never done in my whole life. I was so nervous but I did it. I've been with him for 6 months now. We get on well. Something he says really upset me recently. He said it is not convincing that I am a slag as I can sleep with him on the first night out. I am really mad that he cant see I am a nice lady and just do it because I've fallen for him. I dont know what to do. This comment spoil our relationship and I dont know to carry on with him or leave him. Please advise.
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (20 November 2007):
Who is he to make you feel bad when HE slept with you on the first night too??? Seriously how does that even make sense in his head? Is there one rule for men and another for women? Or one rule for him and another for him? Talk about double standards! Honestly I think this is a sign that hes a total loser....what type of decent guy sleeps with you on the first dates and makes you out to be a slag? I would leave him. I dont think he deserves a 2nd chance. Prove it to him that you have alot of self respect and will not put up with this inappropaite comment.
A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (20 November 2007):
 The old double standrd is rearing it's ugly head again. Afterall, he had sex too. You were probably excited about being with somone else and let your guard down. We are judged by what we do. So if he's trying to protect his feelings or figure youo out, he might wonder if this is how you behave. I don't think it was the best thing to do but you still shouldn't have to put up with his judgements. Give him a choice, shut up or leave.
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A
female
reader, hello1 +, writes (20 November 2007):
 Say, "well it takes two to tango so you must be a slag too!"
Don't put up with this, maybe he wants you to dump him? very strange
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A
male
reader, TomWilkinson +, writes (20 November 2007):
 You need to remind him, it wasn't just you who was there! You BOTH had sex that night, try a bit of reverse psychology, tell him if you're a slag, that makes him a slag too!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2007): Tell him to get over it or to get lost, the choice is his!!! Dont put up with this crap, you deserve better and you are not desparate! Why is he going on like this? You slept with him on the first date, so what? He enjoyed it didnt he, be strong and dont put up with this nonsense!
take care.xx
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