A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I have a gf but we haven't had sex in a while she is out of town ... I miss it and sometimes i watch porn and porn videos of gays come out ....so today there is someone that i didnt know and we were talking on the internet and he asked me if i wanna come over for some gay experience. I said sure even if i wasnt sure i wanna do this.. once there he gave me a head and played with his di** until we came. And then i left. I feel horrible i have so much guilt and i dont wanna do this ever ever again. I feel disgusting and im feeling so much guilt in me. What should i do ??And should i tell my gf? But most important what should i do to let this guilt go away.
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male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (8 February 2011):
I suspect you have too much guilt inside you to keep this quiet and it will all come out.
Telling her you cheated will be a big enough kick in the teeth for her. Finding out it was with a bloke will probably be an even bigger body blow.
You have to accept you may not have a girlfriend for much longer.
What are you feeling more guilty about - cheating or doing something with a bloke?
A
male
reader, dudeology +, writes (7 February 2011):
Just break up with her in a benign way "its not you its me" "I'm not the same person ...whatever." There are a lot more girls and obviously guys out there. If you tell her and she doesn't take it well, then she may share in the guilt and hurt. Just end it and stay single for a couple of months until you get your preferences sorted out.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2011): You cannot build a relationship on lies and you certainly cannot sustain a relationship with lies.
How to overcome your guilt: confess that you cheated on her.
Next time:stay away from any temptations.
Whether it was only oral or not, if you do not tell her then not only are you a liar but unfaithful as well.
I think one of the reasons you feel disgusted and guilty is perhaps bec you are uncertain about your sexual orientation????
LoveGirl
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A
female
reader, charliesdevil73 +, writes (4 February 2011):
You need to tell her. You cheated on her. She may or may not leave you over this. Be honest with her and tell her that you feel guilty. Tell her why you did it, whether it was experimentation or not. And, from now on, stick to porn videos when you're in a relationship. It's easier for women to deal with those than any kind of cheating.
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A
male
reader, Leodjoneluv +, writes (3 February 2011):
Prey and ask forgiveness. Dont tell her. She will surely leave you. you have to be careful and smart man.
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A
female
reader, preachersdaughter69 +, writes (3 February 2011):
Honestly I don't think you should tell her unless you don't want her to be your girlfriend anymore. You're young, you experimented once, it was just oral, it's not that big of a deal.
Of course if you think she might be ok with it and maybe even be a little kinky herself, then go ahead and tell her. It might turn her on. You never know.
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A
female
reader, mselu08 +, writes (3 February 2011):
If you are in love with your girlfriend and see this as a long term deal, then you must come clean and tell her. If not, then you need to end things with her. What you did was a huge thing, and I'm sure you don't want that getting out to people. If you trust her and honestly believe that she will work through this thing with you, then tell her. If not, move on.
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A
female
reader, seniorfreshy14 +, writes (3 February 2011):
Here's the things: girls like honesty. If you express that you feel guilty and that you know it wasn't right then make sure you inform her of that. Lieing and not telling her will lead to more issues and will make you feel worse. Just remember that if she really likes you a lot and cares about you, she will hear you out and not over react and leave right away. Just keep your head up. It was one mistake!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): Yes i agree, you need to tell your girlfriend trust me after you tell her you will fell alot better. In a way you cheated you know, so who knows how she would take this especially since you fooled around with another guy.
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A
male
reader, df30 +, writes (3 February 2011):
Well thats interesting, honestly you need to tll your gf about this I think its probably the best move.She gonna be pissed so expect that but I would own up to it. Thats the only way you are going to feel any better about the situation, trust and honesty go along way with anyone especially females.
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