A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I feel very alone and lonely. I feel like no one cares. I have learnt to love myself and keep myself occupied. However i have been going through tough times with my gf. I’m sure we will be okay, but I feel disconnected with her, we did break up although we speak daily, and still care. I can never explain my feelings. I have friends who do not know what is inside me. I could be in pain and suffering and they do not even know because they care not to ask. Now ppl will say they are rubbish friends. They are kind but not someone who will go out thier way to find out what’s up. Although we have good times. I feel disconnected from my parents, brother/sister, girlfriend, my friends. Even at work, in a meeting, I bet they think I am weird and don’t speak or get my words fuzzed up. I get anxiety when everyone looks. I’m so confused why I am deteriorating at this age. I should be stronger. Sometimes I think I have a disorder. But I do not know where to start. I cannot concentrate, my thoughts consume me and my mind wonders. So many friends but no one close enough to pour my heart out too. It’s hard to explain, even my gf (well ex now) doesn’t have much to say. I feel so lost. And now I got tears in my eyes but I don’t know why. I can never explain this to anyone. What is up with me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2021): I am assuming the last post is from the OP as well?
You seem to be describing the symptoms of depression. You need to get a full medical examination all the same. Ask your doctor for a referral to consult with a psychiatrist. You need both a physical and psychological evaluation.
If you don't trust doctors, have all these peculiar feelings, and an aversion to medical treatment; just imagine how bad things might get if you continue to go untreated. You are an adult, and childish reluctance to being treated for illness and attending to your mental-health is just plain foolish.
Why did you bother asking for our advice?
It makes no sense to seek anybody's advice if you have all sorts of excuses and reasons to resist any of the suggestions offered to you. Then your only alternative is to continue feeling as you do, and get progressively worse; until you're forced to be hospitalized. Maybe that's when you'll finally get the necessary treatment you need.
There comes a time in our lives when our broken and lost souls require the benefit of devine nourishment, and we need spiritual refreshment. Maybe it is time to pursue faith and worship. Sometimes you have to get on your knees, and just ask God to help you. You don't even have to believe, nothing special is required of you; just have an open-mind and sincere heart. Some answers don't come from science or human wisdom. You've debunked and disqualified any suggestion to see a doctor. Maybe God and faith is what your soul and spirit are yearning for. Something other human beings and the world cannot give you.
God is very adept and an expert at handling "the invisible!" Stop by a church or place of worship.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2021): This sounds like symptoms of depression.
Doctors normally prescribe anti-depressants and / or therapy.
I've done the therapy route. It helped me to understand a lot about my past in an intellectual sense, but definitely didn't 'fix' me.
I'd strongly suggest that exercise is the best anti-depressant, far more effective than either of the other two choices. It would be an extension of learning to love yourself.
You are still young and in good physical health, so work with that strength before you get older and decrepit and it's too late; join a team for team sport and / or do some solo exercise - anything cardiovascular is great and yoga is wonderful, as is dancing of any kind. There's swimming, sailing, walking and hiking - so much to choose from. Having some kind of group activity will help you connect to others in a non-threatening way, as the group will focus on the activity, not on you as such; you will get to know people gradually and the way this activity will help your mind and body is, I think, unbeatable.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2021): I have zero trust in doctors. I can go in with bleeding and they find it a nuisance. As a result I have a huge infection as I followed thier orders and ignored it after I was told it would heal.
Can you imagine explaining something invisible? I rather they do not just prescribe me some mad pills, as that is not what I’m looking for. My mum took them when I was very young when she tried overdosing. Than she was mad because of them tablets. It took me years to help her.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2021): Hi
Try and book an appointment and talk through your anxiety and how you feel different. Feeling a little different from others can not be nice for you. But do remember we are all meant to be different and this is not always a bad thing or anything to worry about. I do think having a professional to talk with will help you a great deal in understanding yourself better and help you with your depression or low moods.
I do think you could be suffering with isolation during the lockdown, Please don't get too down, Isolation and loneliness is a painful experience for people, and I do sympathise especially during these difficult time's.
I would think these are the times when we start to analysis everything about ourselves 'introspection'.
Can I suggest you make an appointment with GP, and while you are waiting start to do something that is outside your head, for example, nice music and painting, sketching to take your mind of internalising everything.
Please don't be sad and if you get very lonely, you can always speak to us agony aunts and uncles , you are not alone and things will get brighter soon.
Make that appointment and ask for support.
Sending you a big rainbow hug :)
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (23 February 2021):
 Yes i think that your first port of call should be to book an appointment with your GP and obtain some professional advice.
Its good that you have learnt to love yourself and keep yourself occupied, this is a step in the right direction.
Continue working on yourself and maybe try to get in one piece of exercise a day. Go for a walk in nature and clear your thoughts of everything apart form the sound of nature.
Get some insence sticks and do half hour's meditation a day saying to yourself positive affirmations.
But pop along to your GP first and see what advice the doctor can give you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (23 February 2021):
 Write down AS best as you can how you feel and BRING that with you to see the doctor.
And yes, GO see your doctor.
Start there.
Also, exercising is good for the whole body including the brain. So maybe start small but get some exercise in.
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A
female
reader, Chioma okoro  +, writes (23 February 2021):
 Now let's picture this,
Maybe is a part of your life that went wrong and it is affecting other area of your life.
I want you to understand that this is a stage or phase of life and after this depression and tiredness comes hope and peace but I'll recommend one thing for you and that's GOD.
He has all your answers to your prayer, he created you and knows you in and out.
Believe me if you go down in GOD in prayers he will definitely come to your rescue.
Just go to GOD my dearest.
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A
female
reader, CarrieSoa +, writes (23 February 2021):
 It sounds as though you may be depressed. Please make an appointment with your GP and discuss how you are feeling to them. They can provide support in ways that family and friends cannot. They will refer you to a specialist in this area.
They might want to run some tests just to make sure nothing else is going on within your body.
Please keep us updated on your progress.
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