A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:My daughter is 22 and has not had a boyfriend since she was 17. A boy she went out with for a couple of years broke up with her. She is a pretty girl and a little bit overweight (size 14) not huge. She is starting to feel like something is wrong with her. Most of her friends are hooked up and getting pregnant. That is not what she wants - she is in school and working. When she does have a friend to go out with the guys always go after her friends. I feel so bad for her it breaks my heart. Any suggestions?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): i don't have advise for the daughter but just want to congratulate YOU for being a caring mun to her. you see our kids mean the world to us, we make our mistakes with them, but when it comes down to it, we want them to be happy. we just die thinking that they are unhappy or hurt /miserable/ and so forth.
so to you , and other mothers out there, caring and loving our children, i salute you all. i just think mums are the greatest.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): Thanks for all the responses. I got something I can try out of each one of them. It's good to know there are so many people willing to help.
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A
female
reader, kota_lover1615 +, writes (5 August 2009):
tell ur daughter that mr.right will come sum day!!!
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A
female
reader, Renee okc +, writes (5 August 2009):
It sounds like she maybe depressed after not having a bf since 14, maybe this is coming across to people that she is around. We become sarcastic and just hard when things we want aren't going our way so maybe that is turning guy's off. I will tell you size 14 is not big at all maybe she is a little chubby, She must be shy because the world is full of men looking for a relationship. Maybe you should see about getting her some therapy so she can release her frustration and figure out where to go from here. Since she is going to school and working I'am sure she is under alot of stress and then not having anyone to share her life with right now is even more depressing. Get her someone to talk too so she can release and I'am sure you would be surprised at the change in her personality and how people react to her.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2009): Yes, my point of view is different. Stop worrying! I'm a mom, and my son didn't date for years. I knew he was upset about it, because he went through junior and senior high w/no dates. He is tall and thin. I just thought when the time is right, it will happen. He has had girls tell him that he was too "energetic" to date... So one day, he met a nice girl. Funny how he told her that she was too much like his mom. Anyway, long story short, they're going out, and having a wonderful time together!!! Her time will come!!!
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (5 August 2009):
That's so sweet that you care about your daughter's feelings like that. Really, though, as her father what can you really tell her without offending her or making her feel even more insecure about being single when you even notice? I think all you can do is remind her she doesn't need a boyfriend to be happy and that finding happiness is only what she can find within herself. Sure, having someone to love makes your life a little happier, but it's not the end all, be all--she's still young.
If you think that her being overweight is a factor, you can't blatantly tell her that she's overweight and that's why she's not finding someone. Because that isn't always necessarily the case. But if you talk to her and ask her what she thinks is wrong with her and she thinks being overweight may be an issue, then I think that's something you can help her with. Helping her get healthier foods or even joining a gym with her. You can be her workout partner and motivator.
Maybe she needs a boost of self confidence, and just letting her know that she's fine just the way she is and that she can be happy on her own and that the right person will come along eventually will help ease her mind a little bit. It all comes from within and whatever it takes for her to feel great about herself, will shine through and others will be able to see it.
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A
female
reader, Charlpop  +, writes (5 August 2009):
 As her Father, she might not react too positively to your trying to be involved in her love life, but it's wonderful that you're trying to help her!
You could suggest that she have a few of her friends round to the house to have a night in with a couple of movies, instead of going out and being ignored.
As her Father, you're a massive influence on her [whether or not you realise it] and any comment you make will affect her. Compliments will go far, but not too extravagent and not too often.
If she's worried about her weight, you could perhaps arrange some family activities that include exercise - which will help the entire family! I would suggest swimming or taking the dog for a lengthy walk [if you have one!].
Family activities in general will take up her time in a productive way, and so she won't feel as if she lost as much time-wise when she lost her boyfriend.
I'm not sure what else to suggest but I hope this helps!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2009): well from what you have said i think she seems to be well screwed on in the head department.
in school and working will benefit her alot more than hooking up and getting pregnant in the long run. she has plenty of time to meet the right guy, start a family etc...
let her know how proud you are and to be honest i think the reasons she is not meeting anyone is because she is not giving off the signals, because she is doing alot more with her life at the moment.
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