A
female
age
30-35,
*ail..
writes: I kinda need help my boyfriend thinks i'm mad all the time,i mean i kinda am but just cause his bestrfiend told me about some girl he used to date and how he went to go see her while i was at school. i feel like i can't ever trust him and he just doesn't care. what am i supposed to do? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2010): Your follow-up says a whole lot.
You don't trust him because he's proven himself untrustworthy when it comes to his exgirlfriend. You get a big, waving red flag when you heard that he went to go see her because you remember what happened when he did that before.
He apologized, so I say leave it at that. It's plausible that he really did just want his USB cord. Unless he makes a habit of going to see her, you probably don't need to constantly worry.
It's really easier said than done when trying to trust someone; it's something that takes time, and you need time to heal from when you were hurt before.
A
female
reader, Fail.. +, writes (17 November 2010):
Fail.. is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell i talked to him about it and he told me he went to go pick up a usb cable that he left there a while back when they were together. i can't tell if he is lying but i guess i'll go with it for now. He told me that he was sorry for not telling me but he thought i would be mad,and he would tell me if something else happens. i feel a lot better now and i somewhat trust him. thank you very much for the advice. and just to give somemore details about this:i was cheated on before so that could have been it,my current boyfriend broke up with me for the ex he went to see but then broke up with her to prove to me that he changed and completly stopped talking to her when he decided to do that.
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A
female
reader, Princess Aunty +, writes (15 November 2010):
I think you should have given more details for this question. but still i'll answer your question.
Why Can't you trust him??
for this there's only 2 reasons that i can see :-
1.Have you ever been cheated when you was in relation with someone?
Many Many Many girls find it really difficult to trust someone after being cheated. You did not mention if you have once been cheated or not. if you had then this is without any doubt the cause of why you are unable to trust him. But if you really want to maintain this relation with your boyfriend then remember TRUST is very important in a relation. i can't see any future in a relation that has no trust at all. you should try to forget about the past if you does not want your current boyfriend to leave you. i know its very difficult but you should do it for your love.
2. The second reason could be is he trust worthy?
Do you see him as someone whom you can trust and share everything about? Do you see him as someone who can cheat you? Do you actually have faith in him? Does he care for you? Does he love you? One can easily find out about someone through his behaviors. what does he do when you are with him and there is some beautiful girls passing by??
you see all these will give you the answer. and if you are sure that he is not trustworthy then you should forget about him
Hope this helps
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2010): You need to talk to your boyfriend about why he went to see his ex-girlfriend while you were away. He isn't a mind reader, and if he's asking if you're mad, it means he cares that you feel that way. So, tell him. Be mature and calm when you discuss it and try to find a solution. Let him offer an explanation.
Then, please give us an update!
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