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anonymous
writes: I love sex with my man but I feel threatened because him and his exes could go on for hours but after an hour I'm exhausted. what can I do or how can I go for longer?...
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reader, Your big sis +, writes (9 June 2005):
 Maybe your guy has been programmed by his exes to last hours and hours. Most women would love his endurance. And most men would've only given you an hour or less. Maybe your guy is afraid he's not pleasing you unless he goes for a long time. Talk to him about how this is making you feel. Let him know that he is definitely satisfying you in an hour's time. But if you ever want to go longer than an hour, remember what you told him because it's possible he could resent you for that.
A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (8 June 2005):
 There's more to enjoyable sex than going on and on like the Energiser Bunny! Does your boyfriend complain that you're a wuss because you don't stay up for all-night sessions? Maybe you're worrying over nothing (and maybe your boyfriend's remembering past partner through rose-coloured glasses... Ever thought of that?) It's not a competition, either, you know! If you enjoy the sex and he enjoys the sex, then you're doing fine! You could be worrying over nothing.But since you insist on worrying anyway... If you're "exhausted" after an hour of sex, then you're obviously an active participant, so he shouldn't have any complaints there. Just be game to try new things. Maybe ask him to tell you about some of his fantasies - and provided they're legal and don't make you uncomfortable - give them a go. Read sexy magazines and look at websites and think of fun ways to surprise him with sexual activities or positions you haven't tried yet. Share your fantasies with him and try those, too. Laugh about the things that don't work out and have a lot of fun. However silly it seems at the time, be willing to try anything!In my humble opinion, the most enjoyable sexual romps are those that are memorably delightful (fill in your own reasons), not the sessions that go on the longest. Hope this helps.
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