A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 27 and still living with my parents. I moved back after uni and stayed longer while me and my boyfriend were saving up to buy a place of our own, which was fine with me and them, but my boyfriend and I have just split up and now I don't know what to do. I feel I am too old to stay here and people are probably judging me already, but I couldn't afford to buy on my own so I would need to rent - something I have wanted to avoid and the main reason I have lived at home for so long was so I could buy instead of paying rent and therefore someone else's mortgage. It also sounds daft but I think I would be lonely living on my own too even if I could get a mortgage. Most of my friends are married or living with partners, so if I get a roommate it would be someone I don't know. That is not something I am against as such, but having lived with strangers all through uni I know it can be awful if you don't get on with the person. I know it can be good too though but it is a risk. I get on really well with my parents and they keep telling me not to rush and to take my time, but at the same time I feel like a failure for still being in the family home. Any advice?
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female
reader, oldbag +, writes (30 December 2012):
 Hi
If your employed and still saving to buy a house then why leave when you don't have to. As you are totally against renting a place then you have given yourself no choice BUT to stay put till you can buy. That's your plan and your lucky but by no means rare nowadays.
I do have to say sharing doesn't have to be a nightmare at all, my kids did this to be able to afford to leave home after University, to work in another city.Made lifelong friends this way too. You nor the others would want to live with a moron,works both ways, so there are meetings, coffee,lunch etc after viewing,to see how you get on. You can reject them or vica virca.
Make your list for next year, try something new,relax,you don't have to be in a relationship to be happy you know.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (30 December 2012):
 If you get along with your parents, then stay home. You still have many more years to pick a long term partner. This generation can be hard on us because there are fewer jobs, higher living costs, but fewer suitable mates. But people live longer as well. 30 is the new 20.
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A
male
reader, Darrell Goodliffe +, writes (30 December 2012):
 I think your being too hard on yourself. The economic climate means more and more people are in the same boat as yourself. Changes to Housing Benefit especially are making it highly unappealing and impossible to move out early. The bottom line here is that you have got to do what you have to do. If you aren't going to be happy living on your own and you do run the risk rooming that you dont get on with the person although you can mitigate that by, for example, meeting your potential roomies socially before moving and trying to get to know them better. Dont worry too much about this move out when the time is right.
I will be honest, I think this is less about your living situation and more about a general feeling of being left behind. You mentioned how most of your peers have partners etc and you have just split up. Its natural you are going to feel this way about your life in general, you were on course and now that course has changed due to events beyond your control. Try not to worry too much, give yourself some time to find your way again. Good luck :)
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A
female
reader, rachybabe160209 +, writes (30 December 2012):
First of all you must feel like a failure just because you still live at home. Many people do. One thing youu should be proud of is that you are still living at home BUT you have a plan. Youve been to university and going back home is a great idea with you trying to save up. Even though you have split up with your boyfriend you shouldnt feel down hearted and you could still go down the road of carrying onto save and get on the property ladder even if it is just a smaller scale of what you were expecting. Todays econmy doesnt make it any easier for anyone wanting to get there own place so renting may be the best option for you if you want to start the journey. Leaving home at any age is tough at the best of times as you always feel safer when you are at home with parents, but they never go anywhere. You no they will always be there for you no matter what you decide to do and will always be right where you left them should they need to pick you up after a fall. Hope this help and good luck x
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