A
female
age
,
*herrychopsticks
writes:hi ,im divorced and met a man 16mths ago,he is the same divorced also .at the start he wined and dined me,but after all the breakups we have he is not the same,he lives away a few miles from me and as im the one with car he wants me to go to him.he is good enough when everything is going his way and nasty when it doesnt.i find it hard to break away im 6 years older than him,he is very moody he wants to control me i think i love him .as i live on my own i get lonely i think thats where the neediness comes in he lives alone too but i cant see a future. what should i do? we play mind games on phones and when we r any advice how i feel abandoned and cry and end up phoning him . any advice?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, snowbear  +, writes (22 January 2009):
Hi Cherrychopsticks lonliness is a difficult thing to cope with, l believe this man is using you, he sounds so selfish and certainly not worth your attention. Are you easing your own lonliness by keeping in touch with him and perhaps he knows this and is using it to his own advantage. Never ever phone a guy or text him even if he says it's ok with him.
It sounds like you lack self confidence and suffering from low self esteem which he seems to be aware of and also keeping you close with mind games.
Please try to find a way to rebuild your confidence and self esteem. There are loads of ways to do this by personal development classes and getting out and about mixing with others. It can be difficult to do this when your older but maybe begin with things you like to do. Window shopping and exchanging small talk with sales assistant. One way l overcame this was by making someone smile every day and my confidence increased little by little. I really wish you well with this issue and hope you discover yourself and how wonderful a person is hiding inside you and appreciate yourself a lot more . x
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