A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Thank you first off for taking the time to read my post.I've been dating my currently ex bf for 3 years and have lived together for about 5 months. For the past few days we've been very unhappy. I was upset because he started acting like he was cheating on me and that I was a peice of garbage he threw over his shoulder. Ive been crying almost every night. So finally when I told him we needed to talk he refused said we didn't need to and turned over. Now this morning was my breaking point and I told him we were on the edge of breaking up and that he didn't care. He told me he felt trapped. I took that as 'I can't handle being in a serious rationship with you and I'm unhappy' so I broke down and broke up with him. He was very upset that I did it over the phone so I told him I was sorry and could talk when he got home. I explained to him how I felt and that I tried talking to him but he wouldn't listen and said I couldn't have cared about him for leaving him over the phone and that he would have forgiven me if I had appologized when he came home. But that's not true, I left because I didn't want him to feel trapped with me. He said he only wanted a weekend to himself, and that were done. Did I do the right thing..? Please advise on what I should do
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female
reader, bayoulady +, writes (9 January 2010):
You did the right thing. Don't second guess yourself.
For one thing he said he felt trapped.
Second... you said you were sorry. Then he gave you a guilt trip for doing it over the phone?
He told you over the phone it was over when he said he felt trapped.
He gave up on you way before you did on him.
I am happy you saw it b4 it was too late.
Move on. You are young girl. Be strong.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2010): Girl, I just did the same thing. I put my BF out today....I have tried 50 million times but always fall for him calling me and needing something...he's unemployed, live with a relative. He has already admitted that he was a manipulator, con artist, and a womanizer, not to mention, he has a mental disorder, Sociopath...i fell for the okey doke. He abused me mentally, emotionally, physically. He beat me up New Years Eve. When was living with me, he stayed on myspace, facebook, urbanchat, looking at porn. He is always textn all times of day and night...girl it was like living in HELL, on the other hand, HELL can't be that bad. It added up to my hair coming up, me smoking cigarettes like there was no tomorrow, and worrying like HELL. Yea my heart hurts, but THIS TOO WILL PASS. Instead of fighting the pain, feel the pain. Also, if you don't have it already, get "MADEA GOES TO JAIL", not the move but the live version of the play, watch that, but pay especially close attention to the Message Madea gives her nephew in the moving when he is hurting, and down and out after he found out his baby by his wife was not his....YOU listen to that message and play it over, and over...Girl please believe, you are going to be alright, because seems like you have no peace of mind, and all that leads to is illness, and sometimes death from worry....I am sitting here tonight, not worrying about him up in my house textn and facebooking, and other stuff, peace of mind....what is hurting me, but only a little, is the fact that even though we JUST broke up, I will bet my paycheck on it that he is with another girl just like that....read up on sociopaths. Not saying your boyfriend is one, but its good reading....GOOD LUCK, and Keep your head up.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (8 January 2010):
Yes, you did do the right thing by getting rid of him. Clearly he's not into you enough to care about you, and is blaming you. Let him go, and you move on.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (8 January 2010):
Awww, how convenient, it's all your fault and that means you have to take him back and be EXTRA nice when he treats you like rubbish.
You tried to talk to him and he wouldn't listen.
He's an idiot and you can't let him manipulate you like this.
Cut contact with him and move on. You must see that you deserve better than this.
Good Luck!! xx
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