A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am nearly 17 and my wonderful grilfriend is 16. We have been togetehr for nearly 10months and i am completely devoted to her. And i madly love her. Recently, we have been more passionate. Kissing and 'groping'. But i am becomign worried that this may evolve into something sexual, which i have always tried to avoid, however, i am scared in the heat of the moment, i will not be able to control myself. I think she is a lot more relaxed than me on the 'sex' subject but we have never really talked about and i dont want to talk about it and get ahead of myself. I like how things are and dont think we need to have sex at all, but im scared it may happen anyway. Any tips on trying to slow that evolution down or should i just let things unfold? I am very surte about her but dont wnat to upset her or disrepect her love and her body in such a way but i cant control myself. I enjoy being passionate with ehr but i'm starting to become worried. Thanks
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female
reader, hugs2muchgal  +, writes (26 May 2007):
 I am a 16 year old girl with a 17 year old boyfriend and I can tell you from my own experience, I believe you should talk to your girlfriend.
Honesty and talking are important in any loving relationship and for me, in my relationship my boyfriend tells me he is eager to have sex, but is willing to wait for me since I'm not ready. We talk about our feelings about the subject and every month or so we have a short conversation to see how we stand on it.
You are probably jumping to conclusions about your girlfriend being ready, for all you know, she might be as unwilling as you. If she is ready, well, then it would be good to let her know she'll have to wait.
Also on the whole being worried about being passionate? Nothing to worry about. You are a teenage boy and it's completely normal (and I bet your girlfriend loves the fact that you love her so unconditionally). Enjoy your relationship, talk if the time comes, and let everything happen naturally, don't force your relationship in either direction, because it could end up hurting her if you push her into sex, or if you reject her from it without warning.
Good luck.
-Hugs
A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (26 May 2007):
 If you don't want to have sex with her yet, tell her that you need to slow things down. Tell her that you were also in the wrong for causing things to move so fast, but that you're getting scared and would like to slow down. She'll respect that.
DV1
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