A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello, I'm having some problems with my girlfriend, We have been together for around nine months : Now, I have told her several times that I have wanted to leave her, Since to be honest, She doesn't act like a proper girlfriend.And lots of people have adviced me to do so, Seeing as I don't look happy and I always seem to find something wrong with out relationship.She doesn't call, But texts and and She keeps we waiting and hanging on, We are now on holiday, And it has been four weeks since I haven't seen her, Though she goes out with her friends to party's and things like that, Male or female, I don't know.Now, We have only seen each other out of school once, Without her friends being there.I'm starting to get the feeling she doesn't care about our relationship, Or is either seeing someone else.And every time, I bring up problems, She seems to find a way of convincing me that I'am wrong.Though she says she loves me to bits, And that she has never even dreamed about cheating on me, I'm not convinced.So, Since she has a lot of friends, I kind of get "bullied" by them all.I really don't want to leave her, Since I love her so much, But if that is the last option, Then so be it.
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male
reader, timbo  +, writes (26 July 2009):
I think you need to relax a little. Sounds like you are too uptight about her. Give her some freedom and take some yourself. Don't make her your only activity. Sounds like you're trying to suffocate her. Relax, good luck
A
female
reader, CaliMoore  +, writes (26 July 2009):
 I can see your point of how she doesnt really act like a girlfriend; next time you confront her suggest you both go out somewhere alone and spend time, if she disagrees ask her why not? question her dont give her chances to ease her way out of the conversation and change it around ask her directly "lets go out somewhere alone this weekend how about..." she can either answer yes or no, if she doesnt demand an answer. If she doesn't respect your views and feelings like she does her own, then she's even less of a girlfriend then how she may seem now, it takes two to make a relationship work, theres no room for selfishness; hope all goes well, keep me posted :) xx
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (25 July 2009):
 So, she convinces you you're wrong? What if I told you that you're both right? There are two types of right and wrong. (1) Absolute (2) Perceptual. An absolute is "total." Meaning if you asked around, most everyone would agree it's wrong to commit murder. Where perceptual is determined by the individual view.
She may view her behavior as okay, where you may view is as not. What is not okay is not respecting your view. It's what you believe and you can't be convinced different. Although, I see you're younger, next time talking to her ask: "What do you want out of this relationship?" Talking to her is not about who's right or wrong. You explain your part, and she talks you out of it. Direct it to her and in question form. You'd then be seeking answers and not giving her something to convince you differently with.
Remember this information because as long as you continue dating, and some day get married, you'll be using it a lot. This helps you avoid saying the wrong thing and getting put out in the dog house. Take care.
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