A
male
age
36-40,
*oveisitenough
writes:i am changing the names in this so no one knows who it is directed to... my girlfriend and i have been dating for the past 8 months. we have known each other for about 3 years now. she moved in with me about a month before we got together and now we r stuck living at my moms house with my family. she is also a mother of two kids (2 and 6 years old). she continues to do things with her kid's dads and she leaves me out and i do not like the fact that she hangs out with them. i am a senior in college and i want to move away to another state after i graduate she told me i cant because her kid's dads are here. she does not treat me with respect and now she is wanting to move in with one of her friends but she wants to go without me and yet she still wants to be with me. i really do not know what to do anymore. i truely do love her and would like to be with her but i do not want to give up on everything that i have worked so hard on because her kid's dads are here. what should i do? let her leave? please i am in desperate need of help.
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female
reader, MamaBear +, writes (16 March 2011):
For everyone's sake, end this drama now. You have your future. And, her children will always be the number One concern in her life, untill they are grown. Think seriously about your having to change any plans for whatever her kids' dad want. And yes, I'd feel slighted being left out of the outings. Lots of baggage here that you do not need to deal with when you have your future and your life ahead of you. Graduate from college, get a good job, look for a someone without so much drama and baggage. Start your own family in time. Good luck.
A
female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (15 March 2011):
 A relationship with children involved is a very complicated thing.
Perhaps she thinks that not bringing you along on the children's outings with their dad is saving your feelings? Or she thinks it would be awkward?
If you want to move away after you graduate and her children's fathers are in that state, then you either need to change your plans or break up with her. When you date a single mom, her kids are part of the package and to a mom, her children's needs come first and kids need their dads.
If you don't want to hang around because her kids dad is in the same state and you want to move out of state, then I don't see your relationship with this woman going very far.
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