His ex didnt want him till someone else had him

A female age 36-40, anonymous writes:

So after a horrible breakup with my boyfriend of many many years I meet this nice guy at work who also went through a bad breakup. (Long story short, his girlfriend of 4yrs whom he has a child with leaves him while he's at work to come home later on that evening and find everything, her and his 2yr old kid gone) The same girl who for months was telling him she felt nothing for him, for him not to tell her that she loved him because it did nothing for her, etc...BTW - I have a 2yr old as well...So me and him start talking, getting to know eachother and so on. Everything is going great and BAM! Since him and his ex have a joint cell phone account she finds out weeks after me and him start talking that he's "seeing" someone or talking to some one a whole lot...She starts nagging him and saying how she see's that he already moved on etc...They go back and forth with it and every since then (6 months now) she's been up his ass about "trying" to fix things for their family. The same chick who was seeing her ex while living with him and that was telling him she felt nothing for him...(Why is it that most women dont ever want something until some one else does!) ANYWAY, So after a few weeks of this bull he starts acting strange and says that he misses waking up to his son, etc...So he goes back to her and "tries" to fix things...Then ends things with her and we start talking again, he says that the whole time he was with her, he did it for his son because he missed him, etc and how all he could think of was me. Whether he was telling the truth or lying I could care less at this point...Things start going great again and BAM! Same shit all over again, I'm thinking what is going on and why am I falling for this again! Why am I waiting on this guy...He keeps telling me that he is scared of getting involved because in the past every girl always lasts a couple years with him and then end up leaving. So let me get this right, you're afraid of falling for me, me leaving you but right now you're the one leaving me and supposed to stick around? Well, that's exactly what I did...I fell for him, and got so close to his son and care for him so much that it hurts me to be away from not only him but his son as well. Anyway, here I am putting my heart on the line when I am already messed up inside because of my previous breakup, he comes back to me as always and just last week we are having the best week ever and we get into one small tangent over the weekend over something stupid and he literally just cuts off all communication. (The same guy that was telling me all these great things, introducing me to all of his close friends and doing all these things for me like helping me move, fixing things around the house, taking me different places, basically responding to everything I ask of him...He had all these plans and was always talking about how worried he was that my family wouldnt like him, etc)...I mean almost bi-polar...I have no idea what he was thinking, he seemed so into me and now after that small thing that happened on Saturday he says we need to go our seperate ways because he doesnt see us together...Now this might make sense but that's what he would say in the past and then come back to me...Is he stringing me along...Does he really even care? This just seems like a bunch of bull...Should I wait on him or move on...? What if he meant it this time? He really does want us to move on...BTW- He was the one who found the place I live at now and I literally live walking distance to him...If he wanted to get rid of me why ask me to be that close?

View related questions: at work, her ex, his ex, move on

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A female reader, Justtryingtohelp  +, writes (15 March 2011):

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