A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i am a 2 weeks delayed from now im really afraid that im pregnant since we had sex wd my bf always without protection..my bf said that he will support me whatever happens..the problem is im on my way to my graduation and im on my ojt ryt now,i dnt wnt to dissapoint my parents.what should i do?do i have to abort his baby??? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, pebble  +, writes (16 June 2009):
 Similar to the anonymous person below, I find myself pregnant at 19. It wasn't planned and I've had to say goodbye to a career in management to be able to have this child. But it's worth it because there is tiny life being created by my body. It amazes me and already I adore it and would give up anything for my baby.
My point is, no one knows where life is going to take them. You can't really plan anything because something will always come along that you didn't expect. Your baby popped up and said 'suprise!', just like mine did. It didn't ask to be there, but it is.
Make your decision for YOU. Not for anyone else. YOU will have to deal with the consequences of an abortion for the rest of your life, NO ONE else. Everyone else will forget your abortion, but you will never forget.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): Hey hun,
Your parents should be supportive of you to, thats what their there for. I know how you feel as I had my 1st last year and I was only 18! I was really scared that my mum would disown me if she found out, but then It was too late and I missed my chance to abort - I kept my baby and Im so glad! My b/f and I are getting married next year and my little girl is turning 1 very soon. Im so glad that I didnt abort and my mum and dad supported me all the way! I think that if your b/f and your friends are supportive of you then you should keep the baby - if your parents have a negative reaction than you need to have a serious talk NOW! because if your uncomfortable keeping the baby knowing your parents dont agree - you may miss your last chance to abort! Please dont leave it until the last minute! xxx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): If you were repeatedly having sex without protection then you decided to get yourself pregnant on purpose. That's how the real world works.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): think about what you want to do in life!! most people forget what life is really about! ive had women come to me saying i wish i had children its too late for me now, im too old. ive been focusing on my career too much and now its too late and blah, blah,blah.scientist have just recently concluded that women wait too long to be mothers and have problems having children in the later ages. maybe its something to think about. what matters to you? is it graduation and pleasing you family, or a family with the guy you love?? also, who said you cant have both??? that abortion will haunt you, all your life! you keep thinking what would that baby be like today? you will regret it! also, abortion is technically murder, can you live with the thought that you killed a person, your child for that matter?? just food for thought!! if you want the father, and you are ready to be a mother, if not already, then why stop the joy from happening. children are a gift!!! the best thing to ever happen to you. keep your child!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): I am a Filipino and in my country abortion is illegal. So abortion is not a choice, you can go to prison if you are caught. Anyway, it's not sure yet that you are indeed pregnant. Take the pregnancy test. If its positive..then you really have to tell this to your parents regardless of what they say. You engaged yourself in this thing without thinking about the consequences.
If it's negative, then you know what your lesson is. Next time when you engage in this thing, be responsible enough.
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A
female
reader, pebble +, writes (16 June 2009):
The whole point contraception is available is to prevent poor, unwanted babies being created with parents who don't want them and can't look after them. Situations like this one.
You should have thought about what your parents would think of you BEFORE you decided to continually have unprotected sex. I don't understand how you ever thought that would be ok.
The first thing to do is take a pregnancy test. You can't speculate about whether to abort or not without even knowing for sure that you're actually pregnant.
If it's positive then go to a doctor, get it confimed and then have a long think about what you want to do. It's your body, not your boyfriend's or your parents'. No one can make this decision but you.
To keep the baby would mean your entire life changing. But you'd be a mother, the best feeling in the world knowing you made this little person. You will love it unconditionally and when it's here, you'll be glad of your decision.
However, to abort would mean you go back to your life straight away. Nothing changes and you can carry on with your education. The emotional effects of abortion will stay with you for a long time. You don't just have it taken out and never think about it again. It will be in your mind for a long time. Especially when you start having your planned children.
But ultimately it's up to you. I am a huge advocate of dealing with the consequences of your actions, and in this situation I feel you should take responsibility for the stupid mistake you both made. However, I understand if you really cannot provide a home, love and emotional and financial stability then you shouldn't have the child. But if you can provide those things (no body said it was easy but lots of people have done it, myself included) then you should be a mummy to that baby you created who is innocent in all this.
Good luck with your decision. Think carefully.
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A
female
reader, meg2989  +, writes (16 June 2009):
 No you dont have to abort your baby. You can have the baby and give it up for adoption if your not ready or you can always keep it if you can. You can keep going to school until about 4-5 months as you start getting bigger, the school may want you to attend night school. But that way you can still get your schooling done and graduate. I think you should do what feels right for yourself. I dont want you to be forced into or pressured by anyone. I was pressured into an abortion once by my ex. Its the only abortion Ive ever had, and honestly i regret it because I was pressured into doing something i didnt think was right for me. But if you do want to get an abortion there are plenty of clinics and organizations that can help you. I hope you do what you feel is right for you and don let your parents push you. Good luck!!
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A
female
reader, love-struckxo  +, writes (16 June 2009):
 Let's dig a little deeper in this situation. I highly suggest you don't work yourself up about it unless you take a test and it reads, 'pregnant'.
Stress CAN delay your period, so constantly worrying about being pregnant can be the cause of your delayed period.
I suggest you wait a couple more days, and then take a test as soon as possible. If you don't feel comfortable getting a test from your local store - you could ask a supportive friend to purchase it for you.
If that is still a no-go - then go to your family doctor, or any doctor for that matter and explain your situation.
Let's look at your options here if you ARE pregnant. No, you don't HAVE to abort your baby, if thats not what you want. Putting your baby up for adoption is another option.
I understand that you are young - but if you are pregnant, you will have to tell your parents, and yes they probably will be disappointed but I hope they will be supportive and dicuss your options with you.
Take care
xx
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