A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 21, the guy I am seeing is 32he is my friend's neighbour. He knew i had a boyfriend when he kissed me the first time, i made out with him because my boyfriend and i in a long distance relationship and were falling apart. it is two weeks later and my friend invited him to come to a movie with us, since she wants us to get together.he comes and after the movie i go back to his apt as my firend is "too tired" really her plottingwe have sex, neither of us cum :(, i give him my phone number, before sex though he asks what i want, i tell him that we should go out and do stuff and have fun without my friend, and if this is gonna be a one night thing i don't want to, basically i said dating without using the scary term.i go back to my bff house the next day, he sees my car parked out side and 10 minutes after we get back to her place, he pops in and wants to watch a movie with us, we agree he comes over and when i leave he leaves and he invited me back to his place, we make out for 40 minutes/walk his dog, we don't do anything else because he is sleepyhe doesn't call all week, although my friend who has a brother/sister relationship with him says he asked her if her he should call me, and she told him yes,but he didn't, she also told him i was coming over saturday to teach her how to cook, and he should come byhe comes by, we watch a movie again the entire time he is kissing me, holding my hands, and being very affectionatewe leave her house and go back to his place, we have sex again, i cum he doesn't, he assures me its because he hasn't had sex in awhile and has " desensitized himself" i am upset, i feel like a failure, we cuddle for a bit but i am upset and make a move to leabe, he walks me to my car, he can tell that i am pouty, i say i am not, i tell him my bff is getting mad that he keeps interferring with my time with her, and that he should make plans with me, the entire time we are hugging and kissing, although i am still feeling like crap that i wasn't good enough,at this point his other neighbor who had a serious crush/trying to force him into a relationship drives by and sees us making out, he get very anxious, wants to run inside i tell him to wait until she passes us, so he stays, he tells me he will be home all week and i tell him he should call me, he doesn't say anything back, i ask him if he is upset, and he tells me no, that he enjoyed himself and giving to me, he kisses me again as i get into the car. and well now i dunno what to think at all i don't want to be used again, and he is soo affectionate and so into it when i am there, but he makes no effort in the inbetween time i see him.is he using me? or do you think he likes me?or is he just playing?
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crush, kissing, long distance, neighbour Reply to this Question
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male
reader, benefattore +, writes (21 October 2008):
 I'm going to answer your questions in my honest opinion
"is he using me?"
I think so. If some one were REALLY interrested in you they wouldn't act that way.
"or do you think he likes me?"
He only likes you enough to get certain attention from you.
"or is he just playing?"
I don't know if he's PLAYING you, but he certainly seems to be wasting your time. I wouldn't doubt if you confronted him, he would tell you want you want to hear in order to keep you around.
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (20 October 2008):
 wait and see. you began a sexual relationship. it may stay that way or grow. sex and or kissing is physical. it can be done without emotional attachments. since you already gave into sex, you'll have to watch how he acts out of bed to see if there is something else there.
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