A
female
age
30-35,
*idsummer
writes: My bf and I were talking today about tv shows, and I had mentioned about a girl in the show who was very pretty. And he had said that she wasnt pretty, and she has a flat butt. Which I thought was strange, because I have a flat butt. So why would he be attracted to me? He is 25, im 20. We've been dating for awhile. I didn't ask him about it, bec I didn't want to seem insecure. The relationship is going well, he is always asking me how I feel.
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (19 April 2014):
 Midsummer, is this the same bf you had in Dec.2013 ? the one who is in the military, and leaving in a few months, and already said he does not believe in LDRs ?...
If this is he, it sheds a different light on the issue. Not that a temporary love is not supposed to be as respectful of your feelings and caring as a permanent one, but, in the greater scheme of things, why sweating it that much about what he meant, or if he really,really likes your butt, or if you appear insecure to him etc. etc.
Might as well stay in the moment, try to relax and to enjow things as they are as much as you can, if he is leaving, he is leaving because he's leaving, not because you have a flat butt- and if your butt was rounder , still that would not be enough to make him stay.
If this is a new bf, ... I second everything Honeypie said, particularly that you need to calm down . I think you also posted about texts, and that he does not always answer back at lightning speed, or stuff like that. Try to
calm down, I know that you don't do it on purpose, maybe you are just an anxious type by nature, ... but if you don't learn to keep your anxiety levels under control a bit, then there's not even a big point in having a boyfriend, because everything is a reason for feeling insecure, edgy, and worried, so where's the fun and the joy in it ?, it becomes torture, then might as well be single but have some peace of mind !
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 April 2014):
 He is attracted to you because he doesn't think the Earth is plat, he think it's round..
I mean YOUR ass...
HE LIKES your ass the way it is. Maybe... he is NOT an ass man.
He probably knew if he AGREED that the girl on TV was pretty you would have been upset and presumed he thinks she is PRETTIER then you. So he picked something "faulty" about her and couldn't find anything better then "flat ass".
Don't bring up other girls and their looks/skills if you DO NOT want to be compared. Guys DO NOT think like us women. YOU PRESUME he is COMPARING you, he is PRESUMING you want him to say x,y,z.
It's like the "does this dress make my ass look big?" question some women will pull (in one or another variety) and no MATTER what the guy says, he can't win. If he says yes, he just called her FAT (even if she didn't REALLY do that he just said her ass LOOKS fat in THAT dress). IF he says no, then he is LYING!
Calm down that comment WASN'T about you.
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