A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I'm don't know whats wrong with me, I am so uptight when it comes to guys. I have never had a boyfriend but this really good looking guy hit on me and we kissed and it was great, he was very upfront and said that he doesn't want a girlfriend he just wants some 'fun' which because I have never anything like 'fun' I really want to, it could be a learning curve but I am so uptight but I really want to however I don't want to make a fool of myself, he will be able to tell straight away that I have never done anything, I never feel attracted to anyone but this guy, we have known each other for about 2 years and he is very experienced, I just want to know what it feels like but I don't want him to see how inexperienced I am. Any advice.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2009):
This is what I really hear: You want a relationship from him. You know he doesn't want one. So you're gonna give him your virginity trying to change his mind.
Bingo! This is the mistake that it seems like every girl on the planet insists on making.
Don't do it. Go find a guy who actually wants a relationship and you'll be a lot happier. Maybe you don't place value on your virginity right now, but it may mean a lot to a future guy if you'd share it with him.
As for experience, if you think being inexperienced is gonna be a negative thing to him, you're also mistaken. Men are not women. They don't have feelings & emotions running the same way at all. The other answer is right, you basically have a brand new item and you're embarrassed that it's not used.
A
male
reader, Neboraic +, writes (6 June 2009):
Telling him you are unexperienced wont stop him. Its not a problem to a guy, its like saying to a customer "this product is brand new, fresh from the warehouse". It may out you more at ease as well.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009): What's wrong with him knowing you are inexperienced. Trust me honey, guys just **LOVE** a virgin. It's like the biggest jackpot they will ever hit. By telling him that he is your first, you may make it very special for him and you. You are obviously OK with it just being a casual encounter, so say that too. It will make sure that he is not scared off. But please know that since it's your first experience, you will feel very strongly emotionalty towards him. Just tell yourself that it is not for a relationship. If you are going to end up crying over him for months to come, then stop right now. Otherwise, given his epxerience and interest in you, you can make is very special and beautifull for both of you. Trying to act as if you are "experienced" will make you look very awkward, and ridiculous. He will loose interest, and will see you as a weirdo. So, be honest with full confidence fully knowing that he will LOVE it.
By the way, you have saved yourself up untill now, why not waiting untill the right guy comes along. Why give your precious virginity away to a guy who is not interested in relationship at all and is only seeing you as a sex object? Think about it! If you hold out, you will be giving your future husband a very beautifull gift of pure you.
good luck.
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