A
male
age
41-50,
*hopelessromantic1
writes: I'm getting married in a year, asked her months 6 ago and now i'm not so sure on the marriage. I love her but she took the planning/cost too high for my taste and doesn't want to budge on any cost cutting that I come up with. I want to get married and love her, but having an expensive wedding to impress guests isn't what I'm all about and I always thought a wedding is about the 2 getting married and their love for one another. I don't know if it's the wedding or what but I don't like the situation I'm in and we have argued a lot over the wedding /cost because we have to pay for it and no offense but I'd much rather spend money on a home. Any advice?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009): The fact that the two of you are having this disagreement suggests that your communication skills aren't as good as they need to be. And it may be indicating that you have some important differences in your values. These are both things that can sink a marriage.
Since you've tried to tell her how you feel and only get an argument as a result, you might want to get a referee. Have you been to pre-marriage counselling yet? If not, and if you're being married in a church, sit down with the priest / pastor and try to hash it out.
I think you're very wise to not just ignore the situation.
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