A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My bf of a year and a half get along great, we never fight and are always really happy together. Our families get along and his family loves me and my family loves him. When I say we never fight... we never, ever, fight. People thing we have a model relationship and they say all the time how lucky we are. He is the most amazing guy i have ever met, and coming from an abusive relationship before this he has helped me grow a lot. The only thing is just a few days ago he kept saying he has this uneasy feeling about us. We were talking last night and he said he knows I am the one and that he loves me and would never want to hurt me. But he says he wants to take a break just to make sure. I asked if he wanted to see other people and he said no, and he isnt the type of person to go out and party and mess around. ii dont understand why he wants this break its so out of the blue? is it a sense of permanency that is scaring him or what? he says that he feels alot of pressure as he graduates college this spring and he wants to do the right thing for us. what is going on and what do i do?!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2010): He said he won't be seeing other people?
That's good, you discussed that issue beforehand.
Many of the problems with relationship breaks are when this isn't discussed ahead of time. Then one partner plays around while the other one assumes that's against the rules, and it's a huge mess when they get back together later on.
A
female
reader, Urbanbabe  +, writes (10 March 2010):
 The same happend to me, we are kinda back together now, and i am trying dead hard to make it work, but so scared he will break with me again.
I don't understand why guys dont tell you things, and break up with you outa the blue, and not talk about the things that are going wrong in a relationship, and try and out them right when they need to be put right, its so confusing.
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A
female
reader, wild orchid +, writes (10 March 2010):
 i think he needs space. guys usually want to think it over about what they want. especially since your relationship was going perfect, without no arguements. it usually affects it more.. its perfectly normal to have arguements in a relationship because it lets you know how you feel whats going on. but not having arguements just make the relationship quiet. nothing can ever be perfect. i think he loves you, he just needs time and space. let him have his space and do not talk to him. because if you do then hes gonna get more confused and rushed. whenever hes ready and done with his break he will get back to you.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (10 March 2010):
 Graduating from college is very stressful for everyone. Let him have the time and space to figure out his game plan. Tell him that if he wants to talk to you he will have to call you because you are going to respect his wishes for space. Then make sure you do it.
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A
male
reader, Kenj +, writes (10 March 2010):
 It sounds like he wants to have some serious thinking time about the direction of where your relationship is going, maybe he wants to propose to you but needs time to think it over.
I think he does love you very much and I suspect he will come back after a couple of weeks. Give him the time and space he needs for now.
Hope it works out for you both.
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A
female
reader, Weramazing +, writes (10 March 2010):
 Hi
Whatever you do make sure you give him his space as calling him or trying to see him will make him run or feel trapped.
He may only need a little time who knows give him up to two weeks of space if he comes back to you in that time ask him what happened and why he felt he needed space. Communicate sort it out and tell him you don't want this to happen in the future.
If he doesn't come back in that time maybe try and arrange to meet to talk about what is going on.
I know you said you never argue but that isn't really a good thing. Having some arguments in a relationship is healthy you get put your thoughts across and open up with things you may not both agree on aswell as working to resolve what the argument was about and compromising.
I believe this process makes couples stronger.
I have no idea why he wants a break but give him his space and when he does come back communicate more even about things you do not agree on or are unhappy with.
If he doesn't come back or decides he doesn't want this relationship tell him it's a shame because your feelings haven't changed for him but you respect his desicion and wish him well. give him more space and if it is meant to be he will come back.
Good luck.
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