A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi, i have a friendship problem.recently ther were many difrerences and problems with my best friend followed by a big quarrel but everything was sorted out by a mutual friend. but still thing are not the same, recently i had been in two accidents and he didnt even asked me how i have been.is this friendship has no meaning anymore.because i was kind of hoping things to fall in place once again. but if he doesnt feel the same way maybe i should move on !!! plz advice.he has recently been very good friend with the girl that had sorted out our qurrrel. they are not in a relationship but the girl has feelings for him. we all three used to hang out a lot, now whenever we all hang out together they just get so self involved, i feel left out. i get hurt.wat should i do !!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (4 March 2013):
 What Cindy said. I can't say it better myself.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (4 March 2013):
 Be patient, put this friendship on the back burner for a while and see how things develop. Do not invest all your emotional energies on ONE friend, try to see other people, or cultivate other hobbies on your own. You are just friends , not love partners , so you should not have such loaded expectations on him.
The arrival of a third party , of different gender, often causes trouble between long established , close buddies, but, what can you do, that's nature, you know, the bees and the flowers :)..
You say this male buddy and female buddy are not together, and maybe they won't even end up dating, but if she likes him she is putting out sexual/romantic vibes , and he must be feeling them, he may not have decided yet what to do with this girl, but for the time being I think it's normal that he is a bit more curious / fascinated / intrigued by a new female friend who's into him , and more attentive to her, than to his old steadfast buddy. It may not be right, but it IS, you'll see when some girl will arrive on the scene with an interest for YOU :).
Of course, it's also true that not all friendships stand the test of time, some are just transitional and at some point people who were very close happen to drift apart, and that too is not particularly a tragedy, simply a normal fact of life . But only time will tell, and it is too early now to worry, and most of all to act as if you were a jealous mother-in-law. Let your friend have some breathing space, and absorb the novelty of this budding flirtation, then, if it is really a rock solid friendship, everything will be back to normal. In the meantime, try and go meet other people, don't be the sulky third wheel !
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A
female
reader, cute angel  +, writes (4 March 2013):
 Fights are common between friends,sometimes you sort things out but sometimes it gets bitter while some decide to stay away for the better.. Now why don't you have a one on one conversation with a friend and ask him 'if there's anything he needs to talk you about,if there is anything on his mind he needs to get out,tell him you really care about your friendship with him and you miss the old him,and you really wish things would be the same between you two again! May be thru the conversation you'l have an idea as to why he's behaving like that lately...if things still doesn't work out atleast you know you'v tried but can never force someone into being friends and being his old self,he either is or he isn't!so just hope for the best..good luck OP
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