A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well, today in the morning an old friend of mine came by to help me with math and I thought it was very kind of him to do so. In fact I learned a lot from him, but somehow we ended up slacking off. Then all of a sudden he pops a random question to me: "How far have you gone with your exes?" I'm kinda like what? Well I did answer him just kissing and that's it. It was weird for him to ask me, but he said he was just curious.Then I don't know he tried to go in my room and teased me for awhile. Like running back to my room, in fact I get scared when people look at my room because it's messy. So he kept going in there at random times. And I yell at him for doing so. Somehow he ended up tickling me and he kept getting closer to me to the point where I was against the wall. I don't know, but I'm not used to this, but it made me very nervous. This happened a few times today where he ends up getting close to me. I don't know whether he is a perv or maybe he likes me. I tend to be very dense about things like this and what guys do nowadays.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009): Hey,He sounds like a "perv" :) Obviously there is something happening. However, it's best to use these things to understand what they make you feel. If you are feeling uncomfortable then you need to figure your boundaries. Some women don't like close hugging men, some women are okay cuddling with male friends, some are not okay being tickled. Some may be okay with tickling becoming something else... I understood long back that ramdom, casual physical contact with a man - thumping me on the back, tickling, hand around shoulder, a hug - is not okay for me. It has helped me stay out of drunken madness situations since my friends respect my boundaries. And the ones who are not that close take their cue from this. Having said that, when I met my boyfriend my boundaries did not hold because too much attraction. And I did not mind letting him into my personal space. It's something I noticed after it had happned a few times. This may be a good time for you to ask what you want, what you are comfortable with. Do you like him as a friend or are you okay with something else developing - one time sex, relationship, anything. In either case, you need to work that out - find out whether you have "pervy" intentions towards him or not :P
A
male
reader, empty-1  +, writes (9 October 2009):
OK... Two things -
First, he's a guy. That makes him a perv by default. Don't hold it against him, that's just the way guys are. It seems as though, however, he has enough of a grip over it that he hasn't stepped over any hard lines. Soft ones, yes, but he hasn't pressure you or anything like that (at least not that you've mentioned).
Second - he likes you. He's young, inexperienced, and doesn't quite know how to go about this either. Cut him a little slack, and put your cards on the table. If you like him, great, let him know, and tell him that you're getting signals that he might like you in the same way. If not, then you need to kindly tell him that you think he's coming on to you, and that you respect him and like him as a friend, but do not feel that chemistry in a romantic sense.
However, he does need to respect your privacy. That includes your private space. If you tell him your bedroom is off limits, you need to let him know in a calm but firm manner that it really is off limits, and you mean it. If he keeps up those shenanigins, let him know that he is being very disrespectful, and that you do not appreciate it at all.
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A
female
reader, shawty_123 +, writes (9 October 2009):
i dont think hes a prev he he just got yu on the wall lol maybe he wanted to kiss yu, i think he likes yu
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (9 October 2009):
He's pushing his luck so he can get his hands on you.
He's coming on to you.
I think he was trying to find out what his chances were of getting sex or at least some sexual action.
You may need to have a chat with him and tell him that you are JUST friends. And don't let him get away with "tickling" or anything else like that. Tell him to get the hell off, or don't let him in your house.
Good Luck!! xx
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