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male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:MOD NOTE: Age states 13, but poster stated he is 15.Okay, theres this guy...lets call him Tom.Tom and I have been talking online for about two months, recently we admitted we have feelings for each other. Now, he is 18 and I'm 15, we are planning to meet up (he lives in Ireland and me in Wales) next summer, I'll be 16 then and when I'm old enough, we are going to get a house together, maybe adopt a baby (seeing as neither of us can get pregnant) Anyway, a couple of days ago I collapsed and got sent to hospital after an incident with my father, so I was offline for three days. When I got back online, Tom was worried, and thought that either something had happened or that I hated him. I told him I had been ill because I'm scared he will judge me if he knows the truth about my being abused, its been happening for years. He said he couldn't live without me, and that he thinks about me everyday, and I feel the same about him as well...But we both want a real relationship, including a sexual one..but what should I do? I don't know if I can face sex yet. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell he has a job and im going to get one when im 16
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male
reader, Boonridge McPhalify +, writes (23 December 2009):
 if this was a guy 18 living far away that wanted a girl 15 to come and live with him and adopt a baby, and that had not yet met in person most people would think that that was a very bad idea for the girl. they would see him as being into younger girls and getting them to move in with him without much prior experience (predatorial), which is not best for the young girls. people see two men differently (men are seen as better able to stand up for themselves- although everyone is different and what is right for one is not maybe for someone else).
hope that answers you confusion with my previous point
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhy would peoples answers be different if I was a girl?
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reader, Boonridge McPhalify +, writes (19 December 2009):
wether or not its legal
if you are 15 and talking about adoption it seems you have a strange situation on your hands. to me its not the age but the fact you want to move from your surroundings and social support and network to be with someone you haven't yet met in person.
also if you were a girl people answers would be different so dont be hard on satindesire
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reader, xxSABBYxx  +, writes (11 December 2009):
satin desire - first you are way out of line there....you obviously didnt read what our friend in need wrote!! the guy in question is 18, and our friend will be 16!! how is he " liking younger boys" pothetic really, and comming from a girl who isnt a gay man! please!! now listen friend, grass is always greener, but what you dont want to do is leave what family you do have in wales to go to ireland...if he is coming to you its maybe not so bad BUT.. you cannot go through with moving in with this guy until you know he is what you want...yeah ok u like eachother but you dont really "know" him yet...once you both try the relationship, then you can see about a home etc, and as for a baby, thats obviously way down the line and i say go for it...one thing i must say is howeer...this guy seems like everything, but he could be the opposite..you need to be honest with him before moving anything further...i really hope all works out..and i really hope ur dad gets help too! please message me and let me know how you get on..satin desire - sorry for being a bit rude, i was quite angry with what you wrote!! legal gay sex is 15+, even with an older man, yeah it prob isnt nice to think off but thats life!! someone 2 years older than you is not someone we can label "liking younger boys"!!! good luck friendSabby!xxxx
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@Satindesire: He wont be a sex offender, I will be of age by the time we meet up, I did say that...and that we will find a house when I'm 18 so we can live together.
I understand what you mean by saying about looking for an older boyfriend to be a father figure, but I can say thats not the case with me...to me God is the one father figure I need.
~
I want to tell Tom about my father, before I tell anyone else...I trust him, and need him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2009): NOTE TO MODERATOR AGE SAYS 13-15, we aren;t that thick to not read that he says he's fifteen
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reader, CaringGuy +, writes (9 December 2009):
You need to really slow down with all your plans. If you're having problems at home, then this could be having an affect on you with your partner. If you can't face sex at the moment, you don't have to do it. Your boyfriend won't judge you for being abused, he'll more likely be hurt. But you need to slow down, because if you want to do things like buy a house and adopt a baby, you both need to be totally secure with each other and with yourselves. So rather than rush anything, spend time with each other and really get to know each other.
As for the abuse, you must tell someone, even if it's just another adult. Don't sit in silence, you don't have to. Tell someone (teacher, counsellor, even police). They can help, and they can help you get counselling, which is something you will need to do before you make any long term plans.
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