A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I needed some advice on how to be a boyfriend to my girlfriend, rather than act like a husband. We've been dating for 2 1/2 yrs. It seems as if we have been getting more distant since we have not been having fun. We have a routine relationship. So we basically do the same stuff every week. We're both young college students so money for dates is an issue. Because of our routine I feel more like a husband in a married couple and she actually mentioned this. So I was wondering how to be more of a boyfriend. What is bugging me is that she loves me, but is not in love with me, which she has also told me. So this is why she is a bit more distant both sexually and emotionally. Any advice on how to spice up our relationship and get her to fall in love with me all over again?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2009): I know what it is like to be strapped for cash, when I was first with my boyfriend we wouldn't be able to go to the movies because we couldn't afford the £20 it'd cost!!You know what your girlfriend likes, surprise her with little treats like give her a massage, a bunch of flowers, rent a film together with some microwave popcorn and snuggle up! Bake some cakes together! Anything out of your usual routine!I have been with my boyfriend for nearly four years and we just try to do different things to make our time together interesting. Before we had our own dog we would drive out to our local animal shelter and walk a dog together-we would talk and it was really great to enjoy each others company as well as strolling around new places. It was better than being stuck around the house with nothing to do as we would of become stuck in a rut.Little things can start to make you both re-connect, if she stays cold and doesn't acknoledge your efforts then maybe the problem is her, and there isnt anything you can do but encourage her to open up to you and suggest things herself. It takes the two of you to keep things fun!Take care, I hope you have fun, thats the whole point of a relationship it should be full of laughter and love.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (9 December 2009):
Yes, if she has said she loves you, but is not in love with you, then this is why she is more distant, and that's not a good thing. to find out what to do, you have to ask her. Ask her how she wants you to bring spark back into the relationship. Get her talking to you.
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